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Cognonarssistical.. afresh

Entwine two cobras
egoistic and narcissist
which one would devour
who
the two are almost
but not really equal
Dr Jekyll or Mr Hyde

I know a dearest
one behind the other
every day hide
then it made me decide
to alter my ego
to where only narcissist's grow

I laid besides a swimming pool
not accepting I couldn’t swim
then stripped to birthday suit
smelt me and confided
the beauty that I saw
never ever existed
let me for once ride raw

I turned over and into the water
no more ego nor even a shadow

winters snow did freeze
perhaps another birth may tease
but never anyone ever displease

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Last few words: 
twin error now separated sorry
Editing stage: 
Content level: 
Not Explicit Content

Comments

...!! Why did you do that?

Thomas

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...so like my lost dreams...the flood

Wish you could

author comment

..you know it is difficult. Check "cauldrons' "
and your grammar in S2L3. The stanza needs a tweek.

Thomas

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.

...so like my lost dreams...the flood

Hello, Lovedly,
Another extraordinary piece. Your poetry has had a deeper sweetness lately. I am touched with this one. It speaks to me personally, as I age and familiar things around me change, including me. I feel the waves of questions and uncertainties, and very much relate to the setting sun...submerging. What a lovely line: "...unknowingly emerge beyond the realms of my imagination." I suppose we all eventually lose our horizon, but hopefully all has not been an utter waste. I wonder if you meant for this last thought to feel so final?
Thank you!
L

YOUR INTERPRETATION'S ARE U N I Q U E...

author comment

That's the nature of poetry! :)
L

who we think we are, or at least, the whole of us. Whatever we may have been yesterday, we are that and all what has been born today. I see the changes. Sometimes we do not acknowledge the things we aren't, more often than we do the things we are. You are much more today than when I first met you. You have grown and learned to swim. I am pleased to make your new acquaintance every day! ~ Geez.
.

There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

GEE
Every one here does find a real friend of thy kind let me remind tis hard to define a good friend but you are Geeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeezzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz an exception

author comment
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