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I AM JEALOUS

Submitted by lovedly on Tue, 2022-01-25 22:45

I'm jealous of both of you
not because you cheated me
nor because you dissolved
what was mine
but
I'm jealous of you
just wait to know why
and
I'm jealous of you my dearest
kith and so called kin
coz not because you deprived
all of us our legitimate dues
nor b'coz you betrayed him
whom we loved so much
but
now you two clearly listen
to me
so that I don't feel jealous
you are seeing your own reflection
in the ocean which you denied me

but since you are in your heaven
you help me to pray for both thee

So now no more jealous
will I be

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing stage: 
Editing - rough draft
Content level: 
Not Explicit Content

Comments

Ray Whitaker

Wed, 2022-01-26 23:01

Ray Whitaker's picture

All is good here, i would only suggest that the next to the last stanza needs something refined in it.

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lovedly

Thu, 2022-01-27 12:10

lovedly's picture

but I have missed two lines somewhere can you discern please anyone

author comment

lovedly

Sat, 2022-01-29 22:39

lovedly's picture

TO MOR ROW

author comment
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