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open my door--------------uf dated
Open the door
Remind me ere it’s too late
Who will this task for me undertake?
life is not yet at stake
which door will open
after does the main gate
I don't want to be late
where is in any case
that gate
where doors remain open all day all night
this door is like an open well
enter in and no one will tell
who came in
the door will record all your snaps
taken within
so close the door behind
ere in stark nudity you are caught
the one who you always had in mind
which door is that
I have yet to find
but friends I still have one in mind
this is just a sparring kind
at door opening
which is embedded
deep in my mind
Style / type:
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity):
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing stage:
(c) Neopoet.com. No copyright is claimed by Neopoet to original member content.
Comments
judyanne
Thu, 2015-02-12 04:34
is this for the contest Loved?
If so, perhaps you should depict it as such in the title
I think it is a good entry, but needs ridding of just a tad of waffle to make it clearer
Off you go now, and clean it up - you know how
Love judy
xxx
'Each for the joy of the working, and each, in his separate star,
shall draw the Thing as he sees It, for the God of Things as They are.'
(Rudyard Kipling)
lovedly
Thu, 2015-02-12 07:25
THAnks
this is RE//HEAR//sal /ONLY
judyanne
Thu, 2015-02-12 07:27
re-HEAR-sal xxx
re-HEAR-sal
xxx
'Each for the joy of the working, and each, in his separate star,
shall draw the Thing as he sees It, for the God of Things as They are.'
(Rudyard Kipling)
lovedly
Thu, 2015-02-12 08:18
yes
first i too was making
RE as re
will get it some day
may be //CAUSE//of DEAF//ness //ONE // may //SAY
got /IT//HURRAY!
Sparrow
Fri, 2015-02-13 19:28
Loved
The right door will open as you approach it, but realise that all these doors are just something for you to have as they are part of your thoughts here,
There are no doors it is a smooth transition to a beautiful change in state.
To actually have a door there I suppose I could be at the door for you, to show you around.
It will take some getting use to, lol, but we will go easy with you, Yours Ian..
.
Give critique to help keep Neopoet great.
Unconditional love to you all.
"Learn to love yourself first"
Yours as always, Ian.T, Sparrow, and Yenti
lovedly
Fri, 2015-02-13 22:40
and WHY so?
....'''''but we will go easy with you??????
Sparrow
Sat, 2015-02-14 04:00
loved
Because you may be confused at being there LOL, Yours Ian !!
.
Give critique to help keep Neopoet great.
Unconditional love to you all.
"Learn to love yourself first"
Yours as always, Ian.T, Sparrow, and Yenti
lovedly
Sat, 2015-02-14 08:33
hahahahaaa
confused at which door to open
when and where
all my doors remain open
every day
every where
alas which door do you mean?
do with me share
as one door alone is the most
which I care
but cannot share ..
so you all take care
beware
as I like everyone else
won't that door share