Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.
Where Are They
Those that said,
We own the earth
And whatsoever in it.
Where are they?
Those that said,
We’re supreme than the universe,
Even God.
Where are they?
Those that ruled the earth,
Lived beyond their days and
Command like the god of the sky.
Where are they?
Those that spent their days on honey and
Manipulated whatsoever they needed
When they controlled the affairs of the states.
Where are they?
Those that saved our eyes from sorrow,
The tyrannical enforcement of our masters,
And barbaric songs we danced to.
Where are they?
Where are the women
Who breastfed us in sorrow
Who cared for us till youth?
I looked around, I didn’t see them, but
I could hear their voices
Singing to my ears
The songs of sorrow, they sang in those days.
Review Request (Intensity):
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction):
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Editing stage:
Content level:
Not Explicit Content
(c) Neopoet.com. No copyright is claimed by Neopoet to original member content.
User login
Author information
Region & Country
Osun
Favorite Poets
William Wordsworth, Niyi Osundare, Wole Soyinka, J.P Clack
Other recent work
Active Workshops & Contests
Contest
Workshop
- Splash Pool: How to use imagery in poetry..
- Wading Pool: Neopoet How To Video Resources
- Olympic Pool: Earn A Poem Workshop 2
- Olympic Pool: Earn A Poem Workshop 1
- Plunge Pool: Stream Workshop
Comments
Candlewitch
Mon, 2022-06-13 04:36
hello Joghe,
your title is interesting, your language usage could be a bit better. the pacing is good. the question is: why do you want to know "where they are" it would seem that you should be glad to see them gone? what is the purpose of this poem? I really want to know. keep on writing!
*hugs, Cat
*
When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.
Geezer
Mon, 2022-06-13 07:59
I'm thinking...
that the questions are rhetorical, and slightly sarcastic. The dances to "barbaric songs" are the rituals and savagery of those inducted into slavery, and ripped away from their cultures. Where are those "slavers' now? They only added to the pain, and did not make their lives better, even though they were supposed to be as big or bigger than God. I get that the women who "breastfed us" have gone from the scene, because they have either given up in despair or had to go to work and support the family. Maybe if you try to show that they have not fared any better than the rest of the world and have many problems of their own; you may put forth the idea in a stronger light. ~ Geezer.
.
There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.
Jackweb
Mon, 2022-06-13 13:49
Rhetorical question:
As there is no body to answer the question, a rhetorical question is usually designed to speak to the reader directly. It allows the reader a moment to pause and think about the question.
In the poem, I can say this is a satirical poetry! The poet mocks those who were in the highest level of authority in the state and society.
In general, the poem is pointing an accusing finger on the vile politicians who had past on. There leadership
was like dictatorship. With absolute power without effective constitutional limitations.
"By virtue of creativity, my literary genre is poetry".
~Jackweb
Jackweb
Mon, 2022-06-13 13:49
Rhetorical question:
As there is no body to answer the question, a rhetorical question is usually designed to speak to the reader directly. It allows the reader a moment to pause and think about the question.
In the poem, I can say this is a satirical poetry! The poet mocks those who were in the highest level of authority in the state and society.
In general, the poem is pointing an accusing finger on the vile politicians who had past on. There leadership
was like dictatorship. With absolute power without effective constitutional limitations.
"By virtue of creativity, my literary genre is poetry".
~Jackweb
Candlewitch
Mon, 2022-06-13 14:05
thank you both, Geezer and Onyinechi,
I have a better understanding of the poem because of your in-depth critiques!
*hugs, Cat
*
When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.
Jackweb
Mon, 2022-06-13 16:39
Alright
And you are highly welcome
"By virtue of creativity, my literary genre is poetry".
~Jackweb
Mr joghe
Tue, 2022-06-14 02:29
Everyone have done well. I
Everyone has done well. I really endorsed your critiques. As Onyinyechi Cosmos and Geezer had said, I'm pointing an accusing finger to the first class people in my society because they couldn't sacrifice a dime for common people.
They are not the heros or heroines or legends of our time. The legends are the saviours that save us from the continual barbaric songs of today's modern colonial masters.
Kudos to those that have gone in the name of freedom.
"Words are currency of ideas and have the power to change world. Ride your pen on the rough road."
author comment