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The Scary Ghost

Dear beauteous ghost
Shining nowhere but in the dark
I saw you walking in air
When your light was trampled in the dust
You were at your best but dull and hoary
Mere glimmering and decayed.

Proudly you gathered, rank on rank
As angel in my brighter dream
Called to my soul when I slept
Some strange thoughts transcend
Like some bright stars above the dark abyss
Through the veil, the scary face
Through dust of conflict and flame
Through the voice, I cannot hear

I cried upon a lonely hill
Where no shadow intervene
I lay in crying darkness
Of little things that run and quail
And die in silence and despair.

Review Request (Direction): 
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Editing stage: 
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Not Explicit Content
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The below is a computer-generated response from Neo, Neopoet's computer artificial intelligence:

The poem "The Scary Ghost" displays a strong use of imagery and metaphor to convey a sense of fear and fascination towards the spectral figure. The use of contrasting imagery, such as "shining nowhere but in the dark" and "bright stars above the dark abyss", effectively portrays the ghost as a paradoxical entity, both terrifying and captivating.

However, the poem could benefit from a more consistent and clear narrative or thematic progression. The poem seems to oscillate between fear, fascination, and despair without a clear transition or narrative thread connecting these emotions. This can make it difficult for the reader to follow the emotional journey of the speaker.

The poem could also benefit from more concrete and specific imagery. While the poem does use some specific images, such as "a lonely hill" and "little things that run and quail", many of the images are abstract and vague, such as "some strange thoughts transcend" and "through the voice, I cannot hear". More specific imagery could help ground the poem and make it more relatable to the reader.

Lastly, the poem's rhythm and meter could be more consistent. The poem seems to shift between different rhythms and meters, which can disrupt the flow of the poem and make it more difficult to read. A more consistent rhythm and meter could help enhance the musicality of the poem and make it more engaging to read.

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I fear to mess with your line structure as I think it would detract from the way the story is told.
I will try to correct any spelling or misuse of words.

Shining- one [ n]
I'm going to say that you might as well say [scary] as scaring face.

I feel your emotional attachment to the ones who cannot fight back, the ones caught in this tragedy.
Innocent lives, snuffed out...

Well done, your heart is huge. ~ Geezer.

There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

Thanks for the correction.

"Words are currency of ideas and have the power to change world. Ride your pen on the rough road."

author comment

I feel the inner conflict in this. The interpretation of the dream - as if seeing something clearly, and then the stark, opposing darkness and crying. Very strong final two lines.
Thank you,

It is clearer when darkness comes down in its hour.

"Words are currency of ideas and have the power to change world. Ride your pen on the rough road."

author comment

I got the feeling that there were two sides to this ghost, as if there were two sides to the writer's personality. The side that was beautiful and peaceful and then the side that was frightening and angry. Almost like looking in a mirror and not liking what we see. Well done!


The two sides are really important to man's survival.

"Words are currency of ideas and have the power to change world. Ride your pen on the rough road."

author comment
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