Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.

London's Burning

London’s Burning

Platform one, twenty-four-past
The journey time’s an hour
Or half the time if it’s fast.
Only a lighter, a fag, and a fiver
In my scruffy jean pockets.
I hope I’m not approached by a train guard…
“Morning all, tickets please”
“I’m awfully sorry, but I’ve lost it”.
“The next step is soon, alite there”
Hmmm chance for a fag, I don’t care.
I catch the next train after a smoke
And the pattern repeats, from other train blokes,
Arrive at Waterloo, can in hand, now train gates to get through.
I make it out unscathed, to busy streets like parade.
Look around, who’s who, what’s what and what’s new?
Different to a village, overpowering is the city stench
But I gather my thoughts and have a drink on a bench.
A pedestrian approaches and strongly exclaims:
“You need to sort yourself out, stop it!
And look at the state of your top, go home and wash it!”
So, I pick myself up from the bench
My thirst having been quenched.
Well, I partially took his advice
I didn’t go home, but I got off the bench…
I walk into a bar, in the end that’s west, no dive
Better than a bench, the decision was wise.
Look for my phone and like the ticket, that’s lost too
Ask a girl for the time and wake up in her room.
Wake up at four in the Am, where on Earth am I?
Blag the tube, still alive, didn’t die, It’s fine.
Reached home at seven, had a shower, such heaven.
Have a cup of tea with my mum
Recognise and regret what I’ve done.
That was back in the day – things have now changed
I’ve finally learned, that was the wrong way
To live – a life full of sin.
If one plays with fire, they will get burned
I’m covered in mental scars, from the place that is
London City – the place I don’t miss.
I’ve opened my eyes, smoke makes us cry
We have to escape the fumes, or at the very least try.
London’s burning, I now avoid the fire
So, I sing from the rooftops, like a London choir.
Just like a phoenix I rose from the ashes
Save most of my money, instead of spending cash in
A city that’s built to destroy you
It will relentlessly attempt to lure you
Into the flames with its crime, money and fame
But I’ve turned over a leaf, and this one, is new.

Last few words: 
All about stopping getting on trains there for drink binges
Editing stage: 
Content level: 
Not Explicit Content
Opt-in: Neopoet AI will critique your poem.

Comments

The below is a computer-generated response from Neo, Neopoet's computer artificial intelligence:

It is not feasible to offer feedback.

Please send feedback about Neo (our computer generated critique system) to https://www.neopoet.com/contact

the imagery and descriptions are outstanding. reading this poem was well worth my time spent! I much enjoyed it. My favorite lines are:

Arrive at Waterloo, can in hand, now train gates to get through.
I make it out unscathed, to busy streets like parade.
Look around, who’s who, what’s what and what’s new?
Different to a village, overpowering is the city stench
But I gather my thoughts and have a drink on a bench.
A pedestrian approaches and strongly exclaims:
“You need to sort yourself out, stop it!

*hugs, Cat

*
When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.

Thanks

author comment

Hello, Michael,
Such a journey. The detail and the thought process takes the reader into each moment, the self-destruction and later, the remorse. I feel empathy, compassion, and frustration all in one. The movement in the poem flows really well. Encouraging ending. Very nice piece.
Thank you,
L

Thank you

author comment
(c) Neopoet.com. No copyright is claimed by Neopoet to original member content.