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The Goddess

Hail the goddess!
I get lost in her arms
My world rests on her shoulders
Even she is ugly
I’m crazy
Of her voice that beckons me;
Her days that come like a growing corn
Harvest in its ripe age.

I dread thinking of
Eloping with her in future
When she sat on my robe
I touched her lobe
And echoed mother’s voice
It is her presence I feel.

Shout her name
I’m proud of her,
Bring her to me
Even when she runs away;
But I don’t know her again
Until I see her.

I peeped out through the window
What did I see?
A gorgeous dressed lady
Walking toward me like ‘Moremi’
The victorious woman thronged by people
Shouting the goddess everywhere;
At my sense,
She should be the goddess.
See her plump body,
Her strong feet
Her oval face
Her squirrel teeth,
Her antelope eyes
I look straight;
While she looks into my eyes and smiles
You’re the goddess, I said.

Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Editing stage: 
Content level: 
Not Explicit Content

Comments

that the thrill of sex, and its' blindness can make anyone beautiful; we just don't see the ugly until the haze wears off. Too bad that most people don't see the beauty of others underneath the outside. A good write on an emotional level. ~ Geez.
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