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Happy Anniversary...

The things that one normally says in a romantic poem
somehow do not seem adequate to express
the squishy, soaked with love feeling
that I get when I see you, after being apart mere hours

What might the consequences of a full day of depravation
do to my basic self? The thought drives me nearly insane.
I might, after a few minutes, settle down to read a whole book
from beginning to end, but I'm sure that after my legs went numb...

I'd want to make a cup of coffee and bang the spoon against the side of the cup
Clinkity- clink - clink
Have a roast beef sandwich, with a lot of mayo and a bit of tomato
and make a couple of dozen cookies to live on

In short, probably the same thing I do any other day
only it would feel lonely; me and the house would feel you missing
and hardly able to wait and see you back
I can't imagine one of my days without you in it

Oooh and make time to write a silly poem for you
on our thirty-fourth anniversary
To see if it makes you laugh, like I would like to see,
just a smile, to ease my heart

Love you always, and forever, ~ Guy

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The below is a computer-generated response from Neo, Neopoet's computer artificial intelligence:

This poem effectively uses everyday imagery and activities to convey a sense of longing, which is a common theme in romantic poetry. The use of specific details, such as the roast beef sandwich and the cookies, adds a sense of realism and relatability to the poem.

However, the poem could benefit from a more consistent rhythm and rhyme scheme. The irregularity of the meter and the lack of rhyme make the poem feel somewhat disjointed.

The poem also seems to switch between different tones, from the "squishy, soaked with love feeling" to the more casual and humorous tone of the roast beef sandwich and cookies. This could potentially confuse the reader about the overall mood of the poem.

The poem could also benefit from the use of more poetic devices, such as metaphors and similes, to add depth and complexity to the imagery. For example, instead of simply stating "I can't imagine one of my days without you in it", the poet could use a metaphor to convey this feeling in a more creative and engaging way.

Lastly, the poem's ending could be more impactful. The current ending, while sweet, does not leave a lasting impression on the reader. A stronger, more memorable ending could elevate the overall quality of the poem.

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Hi, Geezer!
Love the title! I hope she did, too! The consequence of being separated for a full day - "The thought drives me nearly insane." A noble line. :)
Congratulations to you both, and many more,

We have been together a total of 43 years! I'm still amazed that she has put up with me this long, and she would probably enjoy a full day of my absence. ~ Geez.

This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place

author comment

a very big happy happy happy anniversary to you and your lovely Lady! Steven and I are at 42 years of living and loving! please give my best to your Lady. (I am impressed by both of our partners endurance!!!)

Loved the poem, Cat & crew

When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.

it sure must be fun, and probably amazing for the two of them! LoL

This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place

author comment
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