The below is a computer-generated response from Neo, Neopoet's computer artificial intelligence:

The poem presents a thoughtful exploration of existential themes, questioning the purpose of life, the existence of a higher power, and the concept of death. The use of strong, emotive language effectively conveys a sense of despair and confusion, enhancing the overall impact of the piece.

However, the poem could benefit from a more consistent rhythm and rhyme scheme. The irregularity of the rhythm and rhyme can disrupt the flow of the poem and distract from its central themes. For example, the second stanza has a different rhyme scheme (ABCB) than the first (ABAB), which can be jarring for the reader.

Moreover, the poem seems to shift abruptly from questioning the existence of God and the universe to the speaker's personal fears and anxieties. While this shift is not inherently problematic, it could be executed more smoothly to maintain the coherence of the poem.

Lastly, the poem might also benefit from the use of more concrete imagery. While the abstract language suits the poem's themes, concrete images could make the poem more relatable and impactful for the reader. For example, the line "dying with anger, raging in my head" could be enhanced with a vivid, tangible image that illustrates this feeling of anger.

In conclusion, while the poem effectively explores complex existential themes, it could be improved by maintaining a consistent rhythm and rhyme scheme, smoothing the transition between different themes, and incorporating more concrete imagery.

Please send feedback about Neo (our computer generated critique system) to https://www.neopoet.com/contact

Hello, Leslie,
This is a pretty deep poem. Reminds me a bit of Ecclesiastes 1:2. The poem's rhyme and rhythm are nice and tight. There are a few grammar and punctuation issues: "it's" philosophy should be "its" without apostrophe, you may want to take a look at adding periods after complete sentences, and commas to help separate thoughts within a complete sentence. But your theme is strong and clear. The last stanza is captivating. "...nothing is worth more than dying just looking for a place to rest." One of the deepest thoughts of the entire poem, but I'm wondering if "nothing would be worse than dying just looking for a place to rest" would suit the feeling throughout the rest of the poem. Dunno. This may just be my take on how the rest of the poem speaks to me.
Take care, and thank you!
L

I am Pagan so I have a whole other viewpoint of Life and Death. Life is or living to the fullest with out harming others and Loving. Death is nothing more than a portal to another place---! You always write interesting and engaging poems!

*hugs, Cat