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Falling For My Therapist

Submitted by Candlewitch on Wed, 2024-07-17 15:16

In this place of dank, dark cold
brought on by despondency,
misery of matters murky and old.

History of abuses buried deep,
with gentle fingers, he guides...
dimming lights, bidding me sleep.

Hearing his soft mellow tones,
I feel my consciousnesses drift
to a time of pubescent woes and moans.

His voice is the anchor tethering me
to past present and future,
where I find answers to be.

He hears me when I'm speaking
Without judgement he is clear
almost magick, knowing what I am seeking.

How could I not feel such sheer enchantment
for this strong guide of lost souls ,
this wielder of enhancements?

Review Request (Intensity):

I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Review Request (Direction):

What did you think of my title?

How was my language use?

What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?

How does this theme appeal to you?

How was the beginning/ending of the poem?

Editing stage:

Editing - draft

Contest:

07/24 Falling For My Therapist

Content level:

Not Explicit Content

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Comments

neopoet

Wed, 2024-07-17 21:20

Neopoet AI (premium) - 5-29-23 version

The below is a computer-generated response from Neo, Neopoet's computer artificial intelligence:

The poem "Falling For My Therapist" effectively uses descriptive language and metaphors to convey the speaker's emotional journey. The use of phrases such as "dank, dark cold" and "misery of matters murky and old" vividly depict the speaker's initial state of despair.

The transition from this state to a more hopeful one, guided by the therapist, is well captured through the metaphor of the therapist's voice as an "anchor tethering me to past present and future". This metaphor is particularly effective as it encapsulates the therapeutic process of exploring past traumas to understand and improve the present and future.

However, the poem could benefit from a more consistent rhythm and rhyme scheme. The irregularity in the poem's rhythm and rhyme can disrupt the flow and make it harder for the reader to follow.

Additionally, the use of the word "magick" in the line "like magick, knowing what I am seeking" seems out of place. If the intent was to convey a sense of mysticism or supernatural power, this could be achieved through more conventional language to maintain the poem's overall tone.

Lastly, the poem's theme of developing feelings for the therapist is subtly introduced but could be explored more explicitly to give the reader a clearer understanding of the speaker's emotional journey.

Please send feedback about Neo (our computer generated critique system) to https://www.neopoet.com/contact

Lavender

Thu, 2024-07-18 07:16

Falling For My Therapist

Hello, Cat,
Mysterious poem. When reading a few times, I was not certain the therapist was actually a physical person or a spirit guide. I can imagine either, so the outcome of the poem is the same - an enlightenment, almost transcendental. Soft and lovely.
Thank you!
L

Candlewitch

Thu, 2024-07-18 08:57

Dear Lavender,

Thank you so very much for your time and compliment! I will leave it up to the reader's Imagination to translate, lol. I appreciate your comments.

*h & L Cat

p.s.

I do have a spirit guide!

*
When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.

author comment

Ruby Lord

Thu, 2024-07-18 10:56

This was exceptional Cat.

This was exceptional Cat. Your word choice pulled me in and carried me from start to finish. Well done. Ruby :) xx

Give and grow - let's raise our verses together. I'm happy to comment on your work and appreciate a comment on mine.

Candlewitch

Thu, 2024-07-18 14:28

Dearest Ruby,

I am so glad you enjoyed it. It is good hearing from you! I am proud as a peacock to have engaged you with my words!

*hugs, Cat

*
When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.

author comment

Dalton

Sat, 2024-07-20 16:24

Dearest Cat

I penned a similar piece though mine is more based in fiction a kind of romance. I’ve only known one psychiatrist I could fully open up to in my years in contact with them since the age of 19 I’m 47 now. That lady saved my life the others just talk without offering solutions. I found true peace in your poem and as I say it made me beam inside and feel closer to my friend that is you. I’m pleased you have the experience of a caring therapist in your life. I’ll send you the poem I mentioned.

Regards John xxx

Candlewitch

Sun, 2024-07-21 08:28

Dearest John,

Please do send me the poem for I would be most interested in reading it and knowing you better. You are one of my cherished friends. Thank you for your trust. Also for reading and commenting on this poem!

many hugs, Cat

*
When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.

author comment

Dalton

Sun, 2024-07-21 09:14

Dearest Cat

I was attracted by the title and felt empathy through the content of the poem. Hoping that person as well as your husband are looking after you xxx

Candlewitch

Sun, 2024-07-21 10:17

Dear John,

that person passed away, but his spirit remains with me. Steven takes great care of me :) I hope you are well loved my darlin' friend? I too, care for you.

*love, Cat

*
When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.

author comment

Dalton

Sun, 2024-07-21 17:26

Dearest Cat

Have emailed you that poem hope it’s not too weird for you xxx

RoseBlack

Sat, 2024-07-20 22:00

Hi Cat

I got the sense of a spirit guide like L did. The magick and mystery surrounding him, yet the obvious comfort he brings to you. I love the flow and content of this poem. Well done.

~RoseBlack~

Candlewitch

Sun, 2024-07-21 08:34