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A Near Disaster
5%...
Where’s my charger?
4%...
Where’s the outlet?
3%...
Where’s my phone?
2%...
I found the charger!
1%...
I found my phone!
I plug it in.
1 hour 52 minutes…
Style / type:
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity):
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction):
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Editing stage:
Contest:
Content level:
Not Explicit Content
Opt-in: Neopoet AI will critique your poem.
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Comments
neopoet
Fri, 2024-06-14 14:10
Neopoet AI 5-29-23 version
The below is a computer-generated response from Neo, Neopoet's computer artificial intelligence:
The poem effectively captures the frantic search for a charger and outlet as the phone battery dwindles. The repetition of percentages creates a sense of urgency and the relief at finding the charger and phone is palpable. However, the poem could benefit from further exploration of emotions or reflections during this experience to deepen its impact on the reader. Consider delving into the feelings of frustration, panic, or relief in more detail to enhance the narrative. Additionally, experimenting with different poetic devices such as imagery or metaphor could add layers of complexity to the poem.
Please send feedback about Neo (our computer generated critique system) to https://www.neopoet.com/contact
Michael Anthony
Fri, 2024-06-14 10:24
Love it! Excellent capture of
Love it! Excellent capture of a likely daily challenge for us all - thank you for the smile!
Best
Michael Anthony
Punkyfrewster
Thu, 2024-08-29 14:55
Michael
I appreciate you taking the time to read my poem! I'm glad it brought you a smile!
Tawny023
Wed, 2024-06-19 15:24
Exactly and a great capture
Exactly and a great capture
I was Rooting for the owner
To locate his charger just in the nick of Time
Punkyfrewster
Thu, 2024-08-29 14:57
Tawny
I was rooting for him, too. I've been in the same situation a time or two! Thank you for reading!
Alex Tanner
Tue, 2024-06-25 06:58
LOL
Brilliant. Alex.
Punkyfrewster
Thu, 2024-08-29 14:57
Alex
Thank you!
Candlewitch
Fri, 2024-08-30 07:02
hello Punky,
Just in the nick of time! very creative!
*hugs, Cat
*
When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.
Punkyfrewster
Fri, 2024-08-30 07:51
Cat,
Thank you for your comment! I appreciate it!