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Song

Submitted by Indivisible_Origin on Sat, 2023-02-11 13:32

Yours will be the last song I sing
before I forget all the words
I've ever loved A puzzled
smile of gratitude A sigh
in sight of everyone
You are the breeze
I can breathe Just as
it’s always been A fall
slowed and softened
A whimsical waltz in
my final room
Look with me
through branches
at the only sun we’ll ever see
A lonely star that lives to
spare me our final goodbye
Be the sunset I need
Worship with me in the mercy
of loving you for
the words you chose
They were always in
the right order...for me
Mine are the mirrored eyes
you once called monster
that will watch you until
the day I forget
I’ve seen anything at all

Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing stage: 
Editing - draft
Content level: 
Not Explicit Content

Comments

Seren

Sat, 2023-02-11 20:30

Seren's picture

I can't tell you enough how much I love this poem.

Who cares about being someone's first song to be the last song sung? This is your song and its profoundly beautiful.

Only called in to answer a message and noticed it in stream I had to let you know how I was drawn to this one.

I really tried to show you favourite lines but they all are.

Kind regards Jayne-Chloe

“The world is full of magic things, patiently waiting for our senses to grow sharper.” — W.B. Yeats

Rosewood Apothecary

Sun, 2023-02-12 14:28

Rosewood Apothecary's picture
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That is a sad song.

Be the sunset I need
Worship with me in the mercy
of loving you for
the words you chose
They were always in
the right order...for me

That’s beautiful
Tim

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