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Lonely Roads
Hunched and cold with head bowed low
I trudge through darkened lanes
While heavens grief pours down on me
And chills me through my veins.
Roads wet with tears where lamplight glistens,
If I just stop, stop and listen
No sound but rain in gutters flowing
So on I tread with body bowing.
If I should stop and raise my eyes,
Blink against the weeping skies
In widows glow through shutters bright
I'll see the children of the night.
Lovers young and old entwined
Shapes hot with lust against the blinds
I see them sway and clutch, then gone,
And in loves game I'm left, a pawn.
Review Request (Intensity):
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing stage:
Content level:
Not Explicit Content
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Comments
Candlewitch
Mon, 2023-10-30 16:35
dear Alex,
excellent storytelling here! it is just the ticket for the season... my favorite lines are:
Lovers young and old entwined
Shapes hot with lust against the blinds
I see them sway and clutch, then gone,
And in loves game I'm left, a pawn.
*hugs, Cat
*
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Alex Tanner
Mon, 2023-10-30 18:56
Roads
Thanks once again Cat.. Alex
Lavender
Mon, 2023-10-30 17:34
Lonely Roads
Hello, Alex,
A cold, wet, and lonely journey. A fitting final line, "...and in love's game I'm left a pawn." Leaves me wondering where and why this forsaken individual is wandering. Nice rhythm and rhyme. Very nice!
Thank you,
L
Alex Tanner
Mon, 2023-10-30 18:58
Roads
Thanks L, took me a time to get that last line but I think I cracked it. Alex
Geezer
Tue, 2023-10-31 14:50
Very Nice...
Yes, you did get that line right! Nicely done sir! ~ Geez.
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Alex Tanner
Tue, 2023-10-31 15:24
Roads
Thanks Geez.