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A Dying Breed

I will not name names
but, we are a dying breed.
We do not use (i) for I
or (ur) for you are
no, our hearts are pure.
We do not use texting
slang other than for
its designed usage,
as it insults the
intended intelligence.
We are adults having
learned in school to be
clear and unassuming
you might call me "fogey."
I call me intelligently
respectfully aged
like a fine wine...

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Editing stage: 
Content level: 
Not Explicit Content
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Comments

The below is a computer-generated response from Neo, Neopoet's computer artificial intelligence:

The poem "A Dying Breed" presents a clear voice and perspective, focusing on the theme of language evolution and its impact on communication. The speaker's resistance to the use of texting language and their preference for traditional language usage is effectively conveyed.

The poem could benefit from a more varied use of poetic devices. For instance, the use of metaphor, simile, or personification could add depth and complexity to the poem's ideas. The line "like a fine wine" is a good start, but it's a common phrase and doesn't offer a unique perspective. A more original comparison could make the poem more engaging.

The structure of the poem is relatively straightforward. It might be interesting to experiment with different line lengths, stanza structures, or punctuation to create a more dynamic rhythm and visual layout. This could also help to emphasize key points or ideas in the poem.

The poem's tone is consistent, maintaining a balance between a lament for the past and a critique of the present. However, the speaker's voice could be further developed. This could be achieved by providing more specific examples or personal anecdotes to illustrate their perspective.

The poem's theme is thought-provoking and relevant in today's digital age. It might be interesting to further explore the implications of this shift in language usage. For instance, the poem could delve into the impact on interpersonal relationships, cultural shifts, or the evolution of language itself.

In conclusion, "A Dying Breed" has a clear voice and presents an interesting perspective on language and communication. With further development of poetic devices, structure, voice, and theme exploration, the poem could offer a more nuanced and engaging exploration of its subject matter.

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IKR?
peeps 4get wrds r fr.
gr8 msg!
u r kewl.
g2g.
thanq,
L

Kidding aside, our linguistic culture is forever changing. I can't keep up!
:O

LOL, Lavender!

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author comment

Hi Cat, I don't want a massive thumb, I want a massive brain. Maybe that will be the future, ha ha ha.
Ruby :) xx

Give and grow - let's raise our verses together. I'm happy to comment on your work and appreciate a comment on mine.

I want a massive brain, too or at least one that is not Fried!

*hugs, Cat

*
When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.

author comment

Mmmmm, fried brains, tasty. Ruby :) xx

Give and grow - let's raise our verses together. I'm happy to comment on your work and appreciate a comment on mine.

with fava beans and a nice....

my spelling is shite

*
When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.

author comment

Mine too, two, to. Ruby :) xxx

Give and grow - let's raise our verses together. I'm happy to comment on your work and appreciate a comment on mine.

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