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A CHILD CRIES

Who are the children that cry each day
What stories do we need to hear?
The children can't tell their sorrows
They cannot tell us what they fear.

These are the children of abuse
Abuse that happens everyday,
These are the children we must find
Before their abusers have their way.

It might be the child born enslaved
Or the child born of modest means,
It might also be the child next door
With a perfect family, or so it seems.

The signs of abuse may be apparent
To those that look with open eyes,
Or the abuse may hide in shadows
Where the ugly truth so often hides.

The numbers can't tell the story
Yet the numbers we need to know,
Six hundred thousand kids each year
And every year the numbers grow.

The saddest part of the abusive tale:
Parents most often the ones to blame,
Abuse then grows behind closed doors
Each day grows the family's shame.

Not all the blame belongs to parents
For abuse can sprout from any place,
As abusers lurk with troubled souls
Seeking new victims to embrace.

So let's all think about these children
Is there something we might do or say?
As the children behind the windows cry
The children beyond the windows play.

Review Request (Intensity): 
I appreciate moderate constructive criticism
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Last few words: 
In my former life I worked for about 20 years with the victims of child abuse. In the majority of those cases, someone came forward and said something to the effect that "I knew something wasn't right". If you see something, say something. You can remain anonymous and you just might save a life.
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Not Explicit Content
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Comments

The below is a computer-generated response from Neo, Neopoet's computer artificial intelligence:

The poem "A Child Cries" is a poignant exploration of child abuse, effectively using a narrative style to convey a serious and troubling issue. The structure is consistent, with a regular rhyme scheme that aids the flow of the poem.

However, there are areas where the poem could be improved. The language used is quite direct and lacks the subtlety often associated with poetry. While the topic is undoubtedly serious, the use of more nuanced language could make the poem more impactful.

For instance, in the lines "These are the children of abuse / Abuse that happens everyday," the repetition of the word "abuse" could be avoided by using a synonym or a metaphorical description that conveys the same meaning. This would add depth to the poem and engage the reader's imagination more effectively.

Also, the poem could benefit from more varied sentence structure. Most lines start with "The" or "It", which can make the poem feel monotonous. Experimenting with different sentence beginnings could make the poem more dynamic and engaging.

Lastly, the poem could delve deeper into the emotional experiences of the children. While it does a good job of describing the situation, it could be more powerful if it explored the feelings and thoughts of the children more deeply. This could be achieved through the use of more emotive language and imagery.

In conclusion, while the poem effectively conveys a serious issue, it could be improved by using more nuanced language, varying sentence structure, and exploring the emotional experiences of the children more deeply.

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Good poem, I liked the stanza:

The saddest part of the abusive tale:
Parents most often the ones to blame,
Abuse then grows behind closed doors
Each day grows the family's shame.

A tragic element of our society.

Thank you Clentin for taking the time to read and for your comments. Much appreciated. Be well. - Will

author comment

I'm an oldster here, also a grown child of many abuses. I very much like that you encourage people to speak out! my favorite lines of your poem are:

The signs of abuse may be apparent
To those that look with open eyes,
Or the abuse may hide in shadows
Where the ugly truth so often hides.

*respects, Cat

*
When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.

Thank you Cat.
I have been retired from law enforcement for about 20 years but every day my heart aches for those that are still feeling the pains of abuse. No matter if the abuse is physical, physiological, emotional, or other, I wish I was still in the game and could help. God bless the abused and God damn the abusers.

author comment
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