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Desert Wonders

The desert mesas and the monoliths
Where cactus soldiers take their stand,
Give forth their enchanted beauty
When the sun awakens on this land.

Native stewards lend their wisdom
With humble respect and quiet grace,
Reptiles seek the shade and shadows
Cactus Wrens fly from place to place.

Tumbleweeds roll on for many miles
On winds swept through canyon walls,
While morning gives way to light of day
The enchantment of the desert calls.

Vivid hues of red and shadowed purple
Subtle hints of blues and muted green,
Painted by Mother Earth and Father Sky
Give forth this expansive magic scene.

As the heat of day gives way to evening
I listen for the coyote's lonesome cry,
While winds whisper forgotten secrets
Vast starlight fills the night time sky.

Some may see a lonely sand swept land
With no worth and fraught with strife,
Or see a canvas of unmatched beauty
As Georgia O'Keefe might bring to light.

For a while I'll sit in perfect stillness
Trying to be at one within this space,
Thanking Mother Earth and Father Sky
While their vast wonders I embrace.

Review Request (Intensity): 
I appreciate moderate constructive criticism
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Editing stage: 
Content level: 
Not Explicit Content
Opt-in: Neopoet AI will critique your poem.


The below is a computer-generated response from Neo, Neopoet's computer artificial intelligence:

The poem "Desert Wonders" effectively uses vivid imagery and personification to create a sense of place. The use of descriptive language, such as "vivid hues of red and shadowed purple" and "cactus soldiers take their stand," paints a clear picture of the desert landscape. The poem also effectively uses metaphor and simile, comparing the desert to a canvas and the tumbleweeds to soldiers.

However, the poem could benefit from a more consistent meter. The lines vary in length and rhythm, which can disrupt the flow of the poem. Consider revising the poem to have a more consistent number of syllables per line or a consistent rhythmic pattern.

Additionally, the poem could benefit from a stronger thematic focus. While the poem describes the desert landscape in detail, it is less clear what the poem is trying to say about this landscape. Is the poem simply a celebration of the desert's beauty, or is it making a larger point about the value of nature, the passage of time, or the relationship between humans and the natural world? Clarifying the poem's theme could make it more impactful.

Finally, the poem's ending could be stronger. The final stanza introduces the idea of the speaker sitting in stillness and embracing the desert's wonders, but this idea is not fully developed. Consider expanding on this idea or connecting it more clearly to the rest of the poem.

Please send feedback about Neo (our computer generated critique system) to

Hello, William,
Beautiful description of the southwest - literally and emotionally. You've stirred the senses with this poem, and yet quieted the mind. Having seen a bit of it all myself, I cannot imagine how "Some may see a lonely sand swept land..." but you are correct, some see only with limited vision, not their souls. I feel the connection and the wonderment.
Thank you!

Hello Lavender.

Thank you for your kind comments and observations. I was asked one time if I liked the desert or the mountains best, as I have spend a lot of time in both. My answer has to be "yes". I love them both equally as they are both magical.

Thanks again. - Will

author comment

I recall during a trip when dad was transferred from San Diego to Memphis back in the early sixties driving past the painted desert..I was maybe 10 but still recall the beauty if not the details. Some might say a purely descriptive poem is not worth while. I differ. To transfer beauty from one mind to another is always a good thing

Hi Scribbler.
The beauty one sees is indeed difficult to describe in poem, perhaps because you want so much to have the reader feel what you feel. While that, of course, is the goal of most poems to describe the true depth of ones personal feeling and expect the reader to feel likewise is perhaps why all of us continue to sit down at the keyboard.

Thanks for reading and for commenting! - Will

author comment

we used to live in Texas and I know for a fact, the beauty of a desert! In particular the wonder of colors in a sunrise or sunsets of that painted miracle! as if by an unseen hand! So many kinds of cacti, too. this is a beautiful poem and I am glad to have witnessed it! thank you for sharing a moment in your world, with us!

*love it all, Cat

When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.

Hi Cat.

It's been a while since we visited, and I apologize for not commenting on your works or submitting mine. Ended up in the ICU for a few days and ill for a couple of weeks, but now back in limited action and feeling much better.

Thank you for your thoughts and comments, I'm glad you enjoyed the poem.

All my best, Will

author comment

that the AI does not have the capability to imagine beyond sight and into emotion.
I get that there are flucuations in the meter, but most of them could be overcome with a really good orator.
I'm sure that if you were to read it as an orator would, with a loud, strong voice; you would see where they are,
and how to fix them. I don't always take into account a writer's accent or local pronunciations, so I may be all wrong.
I enjoyed the trip, it reminded me of a quick trip out there in my youth. I think that the last lines are very good.
Just passing through. ~ Geez.

There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

Hi Geezer.
I found your comments interesting and helpful. I believe I write the way I speak and I always read my poems out loud and assume that the reader has the same accent and would take the same pauses or other peculiarities of my voice, which is, of course, impossible.

I have been a public speaker, court orator, or lecturer, for many years, and have a very deep voice and if I'm speaking casually in a crowd, people always know where "Will is at". I will make an effort to try to remember that every reader does not speak like me and perhaps that may improve my works. Teaching an old dog new tricks may be a challenge.

Thanks again, Will

author comment

welcome sir.
~ Geez.

There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

Very good poem expresses the trueness of the desert.

Hello Clentin.

Thank you for reading the poem and for your comments.

I do love the desert and all of it's wonders and I hope I have in a small way portrayed that love to others that may have not had the opportunity to know the desert as I have.

Best wishes, Will

author comment


As someone who spends at least four months a year in a desert environment, I enjoyed Desert Wonders quite a bit. The critique by AI, as is often the case, was annoying and seemed completely devoid of soul and humanity, which I guess is to be expected from a computer-generated cookie-cutter approach that seeks to restrict rather than promotes artistry. Take heart, at least the computer gave you some good words -- on virtually everything I write, I get the message that the AI is unable to provide any feedback. That strikes me as a cop-out and a lack of integrity. But again, to be expected from a soul-less automaton.

Keep writing, and thank you for your many years in law enforcement protecting people and promoting peace. God bless you sir!

Hi Richard.

Thank you for reading and for your comments. I first fell in love with the desert when I was about 10 years old. My fraternal grandparents would take me camping in the desert where friends of theirs had a "shack". The kids were outside on cots and there were stars EVERYWHERE! To this day at 81 years of age, I remember those time with much reverence.

Thanks again. - Will

author comment
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