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A Candle

My heart will never hurt you
But my candle burns low
Deception or what is true
I'm afraid you'll never know
I will sacrifice my freedom
To spare your heart from pain
But will your soul feel lonely
In our empty picture frame?

Find another selfish lover,
Make your mind up when you may,
And I hope you shall discover,
All the blessings of the day,
May the cold wind never harm you,
As you wander through this space,
Let the beauteous waters charm you,
Let the bonds of Time unlace.

You may live a tranquil being,
Drifting through the rose red sky,
All the beauty that you're seeing,
Makes the whole creation cry.
As your candle drips to zero,
Let your loveliness increase,
You will find another hero,
Learn to live your life in peace.

Editing stage: 
Content level: 
Not Explicit Content

Comments

for your first post. Keep writing and make sure you read your messages. ~ Geezer.
.

When you are writing for the Random Challenge!
Example: "I Need To Recharge" is prompt.
title is "Plugging In" It should appear this way:
"Plugging In" - Random Challenge/ I Need To Recharge

The word choice, meter and rhyming in this piece is pretty fair for a rough draft.
Welcome

Thomas

....so like my lost dreams...the flood

I find your comment unhelpful, patronising and condescending. "Pretty fair for a rrough draft" is positively insulting (for some reason, my poem was listed by the site as a "rough draft" which it is not, no matter - that was no cause to be rude)..

If this is what I can expect at this site I shan't be here for long.

author comment

I hope you don't bugger off, I like what you have posted so far.
To my ear, your work has an englishness redolent of yesteryear, and is ofttimes missed by the *ahem* foreign chaps.

so, give the site a whirl and a little leeway if you will.

Obi.

I have nothing to say. Welcome anyway

Thomas

....so like my lost dreams...the flood

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