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A tribute to Mother
Like everything else in our lives
We tend to take for granted
The people who made us who we are
In reality we don’t have to look far
Right by our side since birth
Through our words so ranted
She was the one who really cared
She was the only one who shared
Now that I am older
I remember the actions
Filled with everyday love
Thankful to those above
For the one person that gave me life
The very woman I now miss more
There really is no other
Than my precious Mother
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Comments
neopoet
Fri, 2023-05-12 09:02
Neopoet AI (premium)
The below is a computer generated response from Neo, Neopoet's computer artificial intelligence:
Overall, this poem is a heartfelt tribute to the speaker's mother. The use of simple language and straightforward structure effectively conveys the speaker's message of gratitude and appreciation. However, the poem could benefit from some additional imagery or descriptive language to enhance its emotional impact.
Additionally, there is one suggested line edit:
Line 4: "In reality, they're never far"
This change adds clarity and flow to the line by better connecting the first and second clauses.
Please send feedback about Neo (our computer generated critique system) to https://www.neopoet.com/contact
Lavender
Fri, 2023-05-12 13:18
A Tribute To Mother
This is beautiful, Clentin. "...every day love" says it all.
L
Clentin
Fri, 2023-05-12 13:42
Thank you for reading and
Thank you for reading and your generous comment. Trying different forms etc.
Geezer
Fri, 2023-05-12 14:27
The third...
line in the first stanza, needs some attention. Double [who], capitalized people.
I'm impressed by the form, which delivers a rhyming couplet at the end of each stanza.
Good thoughts, made in a decent meter. ~ Geezer.
.
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Clentin
Fri, 2023-05-12 14:45
Thank you fir your comments,
Thank you fir your comments, edits made.thanks again, I really appreciate it