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Undead

Submitted by C. Wolff on Tue, 2022-10-25 16:05

When bone and blood in casket rot,
Your lover's corpse you never thought,
Would come to you in moonless night,
And beg of you in lonely plight,

To join them in the dreadful ground,
With vows to them your soul is bound,
So as you climb into the grave,
A quiet place in darkness saved,

One last glimpse of the world above,
As you embrace your eternal love,
For life and death are neither sought,
While bone and blood in casket rot.

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing stage: 
Not actively editing
Content level: 
Not Explicit Content

Comments

Lavender

Tue, 2022-10-25 17:01

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Whoa! This is so good, especially for this creepy time of year! I could also interpret it as a love that simply won't let go. Your rhyme is good and stays logical throughout. Your rhythm flows well, too. I really like that your first line and final line are almost identical. It brings a nice closure to this brief piece.
Thank you!
Lavender

C. Wolff

Wed, 2022-10-26 07:59

C. Wolff's picture

Thank you so much! :)

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Rosewood Apothecary

Wed, 2022-10-26 05:09

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A double layered masterpiece. I cannot help but think of “The Corpse Bride” a little but it really reminds me of Shadow and Laura Moon from Neil Gaiman’s American Gods.

Really tight work
Tim

C. Wolff

Wed, 2022-10-26 07:59

C. Wolff's picture

Thanks!!

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Geezer

Wed, 2022-10-26 07:56

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I simply have to get up and working earlier! Lavender and Rosewood are stealing all my thoughts about this! [just kidding].
This is simple yet, has lots of meaning. It shows your tight and very regular rhyme scheme and rhythm. I too am reminded of "The Corpse Bride", I watched it again last night! Nice work! ~ Geezer.
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C. Wolff

Wed, 2022-10-26 08:06

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Thanks so much!

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RoseBlack

Wed, 2022-10-26 18:17

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What a fantastic story! Corpse Bride definitely comes to mind as others have said. Great job!

~RoseBlack~

C. Wolff

Thu, 2022-10-27 08:25

C. Wolff's picture

Thank you!! :)

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