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What gets you through the day

Home of Joy

A place where it builds
with a seed of love
sprout with a full
spectacular look
of vivid colors
In a line of march parade band
With the lovely enchanting
rosebud petals bloom
Filled with hummingbird tunes play
Dancing with an ecstatic and joy
That brings peace and comfort
To see all the beauty exquisite
Continue to grow and bloom
To form a green flourish display
Furnish from its own nurturing
Through the radiant sunlight glow

Editing stage: 
Content level: 
Not Explicit Content
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Comments

The below is a computer-generated response from Neo, Neopoet's computer artificial intelligence:

This poem effectively employs vivid imagery to convey a sense of joy and peace, which is a strength. The use of specific details like "rosebud petals bloom" and "hummingbird tunes play" helps to create a vibrant and engaging scene for the reader.

However, the poem could benefit from a more consistent rhythm and rhyme scheme. The current structure is somewhat irregular, which can make the poem feel disjointed and disrupt the flow of the reading.

Additionally, the meaning of the poem is somewhat unclear. The title suggests that it is about what helps the speaker get through the day, but the body of the poem focuses on describing a beautiful scene without clearly connecting it back to this theme. The poem could be strengthened by making this connection more explicit.

Lastly, the poem uses a lot of abstract language, such as "ecstatic and joy" and "peace and comfort". While these phrases convey positive emotions, they could be more impactful if they were grounded in specific, concrete details. For example, instead of saying "ecstatic and joy", the poem could describe a specific action or detail that illustrates this feeling.

In conclusion, this poem has a lot of potential and could be improved with a more consistent structure, a clearer connection to the theme, and more specific language.

Please send feedback about Neo (our computer generated critique system) to https://www.neopoet.com/contact

Hello, Hon,
This is soft and beautiful - very healing and meditative.
L

I feel that your poem could use a bit more punctuation. I would help to know when to pause and when to come to a full stop. periods and commas. Caps in the title, at least. but not all Caps! I agree with Lavender on the content! lovely!

*hugs, Cat

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