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Betrayed

Submitted by The Eccentric poet on Sun, 2024-08-18 21:36

You dismissed my trauma,
For second hand drama.
With sardonic selfish wit,
Hating me, but loving every minute.

My pain to you was so enticing,
So warm, sweet and inviting 
The psychic vampire, so easily fed
By my emotions bleeding in my head.

I'm hurting for believing in a dream,
Us happy together, so it seemed
Now just dust and disappointment 
I've never felt pain so poignant.

For me you will never remain or return,
Bridges are battered, bent and burned
I've locked the door, thrown away the key.
Control is lost, You have no power over me.

Review Request (Intensity): 
Please use care (this is a sensitive subject for me, do not critique harshly)
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
Last few words: 
Still hurting after my daughter walked out saying she hated me, a rough draft so far, just bleeding on the page, getting the pain out xx
Editing stage: 
Editing - rough draft
Content level: 
Not Explicit Content

Comments

Candlewitch

Mon, 2024-08-19 07:49

Candlewitch's picture
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I am so sorry that this has happened to you... daughters can be volatile when facing their split into maturity. I hope she soon realizes how she has damaged your relationship together and makes it right.

This poem reflects your frame of mind and your offended feelings. these lines are my favorites:

For me you will never remain or return,
Bridges are battered, bent and burned
I've locked the door, thrown away the key.
Control is lost, You have no power over me.

I really feel the: (You have no power over me) as I used it in a poem several years ago. I wish you healing and the best of luck. a very passionate poem to be sure!

*hugs, Cat

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The Eccentric poet

Mon, 2024-08-19 15:55

The Eccentric poet's picture

Thankyou so much for your encouragement and kindness xxx

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