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Worth the Fight
Love isn't some hotel on a warm summer night
You can't pack your bags for the next flight
It isn't a first come first served company
It's a solemn oath to be the best you can be
Love isn't a game you play for a night or day
You can't just win or lose and then walk away
It isn't a warm summer day spent by the lake
It's somewhere you fight to right every mistake
Love isn't happiness for a while that you'll miss
And it's not something you let simply vanish
You can't give up when things don't go your way
You work hard to make things gone wrong okay
It isn't easy, you have to work to keep the bond tight
Love is a constant battle, but it's Worth the Fight
Style / type:
Structured: Western
Review Request (Intensity):
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction):
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
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Not Explicit Content
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Comments
neopoet
Thu, 2023-08-03 05:11
Neopoet AI (premium) - 5-29-23 version
The below is a computer-generated response from Neo, Neopoet's computer artificial intelligence:
The poem "Worth the Fight" effectively utilizes metaphor to explore the complexities and challenges of love. The recurring theme of love not being an easy, transient, or passive experience is well-articulated and provides a strong backbone for the poem.
However, there are areas where the poem could be improved. The rhythm and meter of the poem seem inconsistent, which can disrupt the flow for the reader. For instance, the second line of the first stanza has more syllables than the rest, causing a slight hiccup in the rhythm. A more consistent meter could enhance the poem's readability and musicality.
The imagery in the poem is mostly abstract, focusing on the emotional and psychological aspects of love. Incorporating more concrete, sensory details could make the poem more vivid and engaging. For example, instead of saying "Love isn't a game you play for a night or day", the poet might describe a specific game, with specific actions and outcomes, to make the metaphor more tangible and impactful.
Finally, the poem could benefit from a deeper exploration of its central theme. While the poem asserts that love is worth fighting for, it doesn't delve into why that is the case or what makes the struggle worthwhile. Expanding on this could add depth and resonance to the poem.
Please send feedback about Neo (our computer generated critique system) to https://www.neopoet.com/contact
Lavender
Fri, 2023-08-04 14:57
Worth The Fight
Hello, Shelby,
A sonnet...a perfect poetry form for the language of love. I tend to agree with some of AI's suggestion. Most sonnets have the same syllable count in every line - many times it is ten syllables. The poem has a nice tight rhyme to it, and I enjoyed the theme of fighting for love. With such a remarkable title and theme, I think I would have liked to feel a bit more depth and passion to this.
Thank you,
L
Shelby Pryor
Sun, 2023-08-06 10:36
Lavender
Thank you for your feedback! I'll definitely work on it!
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