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mood ring

Submitted by Esker on Mon, 2017-04-24 21:52

cracker jack jacket and gumball mastication
plough into this haunted wind
shoe lace trailing
dog hauling but slow
not even blood tracking in her
fevered skull
she stops staring up at the great
hill...tame woods in suburbia
rising like a giant of a wave
the land humped
we hear things up there
hackle risers
we turn back
the dust shuffling papers
the tree branches clatter
like dry whispering
the store lights come on
the streetlights power up
we are glad to be in
curls up in her chair and
falls asleep immediately

smoke dangles from my
mouth like Hunters did
hunkered over the keyboards
tapping
what will the world bring on
the spell box come morning
either way rain or shine
it will be another
showtime
..

Editing stage: 
Editing - rough draft

Comments

Rula

Tue, 2017-04-25 00:45

Rula's picture
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Wonderful imagery all through.
I especially like the

"not even blood tracking in her
fevered skul"
and though we don't know who she is or what was she after_maybe this is the point here_ because this keeps the reader interest in reading till the last line.
Very captivating scenes.
Thank you for sharing Mr Wolf

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Poetry is when an emotion has found its thought and the thought has found words ........Robert Frost☺

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Esker

Tue, 2017-04-25 23:32

Esker's picture

bravo Rula...
yes...the elimination of
the objects identity and
personification of 'she'
would indeed make it
a more mysterious write
beyond the mere conjecture
of said in its form above...

its funny..maybe
i hit the road with women
my mother was outgoing social
extreme but territorial more then
the overt protection...
we had to be at her side
we swooped through the crowds
terrified at her heels
but then
the rejection..
the loss..abandonment
we were old enough
but
i was found by extreme social
outgoing but terrible sufferers
of anxiety or issues
coping...
dopamine at every dead end
sign and beyond what most
norm would turn about
The moved
grooved
hustled and took on their world
foe...
and they were territorial
so I learned to move at their
side...one step behind them
to their right
our hips almost touching
like wingmates
like hunting dogs
or wolves
i would if they were after something
stay in my place
'go left at the next aisle'
'turn left down this hall'
'head two lights east make a left'
shotgun in the copilot
seat..

i like your interpretation though
not written in context to anything
i sense it more deeply then i had
written as an atmospheric prompt

blood tracking...as in a scent
a hunt a purpose..a scouting
intel mission...
and much much more..

they would sit and slap the seat
cushion..chair couch bench
beside them...they would expect
me to sit thigh to thigh
they would lean in showing other
women and men that they had
the intimate power..leaning
whispering intel...their intent
or just lacodasial passages
and I would nod...scanning the
peripheral horizon...interior
crowd...or in quiet passages
our reflections in the night bus
windows...

your comment is amazing
thus my long explanation

thank U Rula..Steven....

author comment

Esker

Tue, 2017-04-25 23:43

Esker's picture

we with sight...and knowing it still or once
know...the wavelengths and depth perception
if we had stereo scopic vision then a monocular
singular input...is inverted through the lens
and then re inverted in the labyrinth of the mind

perception of panorama is the interior
via that view outwardly
i wish i saw only the things i needed
but i take it all in...
windows...rooftops...routes ahead
every person..tidbit of paper
shoe types...gaits of walk
smells and sounds...
I stare in the thousand yard viewpoint
i look intense...i am large and beastly
in form and shape....i have learned
to move slow....before it was quick
jerking..leaning forward..startling
many....and it was the mania...
i look about slowly now...like a man
content...settles the flock herd of
others down...i rise..taking my time
feigning a poor knee..stiff back
an expression of tired lethargy
but inside i am taking it all in
either direct or peripherally
...
i used to talk too myself
either the insecurity of the mental
function..or self assurance
something left over from childhood
never shut off....a running app
i can work quiet..shop quiet
sometimes...
but stressed....tired...overwhelmed
i revert...so i compensate by dressing
loud...overt....extravagant.....

panoramic..but isnt that the best
see em coming from all sides
no ambuses...no suprises
i cannot wish to be normal
and unafraid

but i am happy...i made it this
far....

thank U Audri!

mr wolf!

author comment

Esker

Tue, 2017-04-25 09:58

Esker's picture

for the record..im one of those crazy men with their dog
a mid sized breed...
and behind all these guys is the mother
an archtype
although mine has passed from cancer
she was an enigma and force

the dog usually pulls like crazy
eager for the long walk
but oft of late...its close to home

she like most dogs is a tracker
its in her...fourth line breed
from the wolf
closer then the husky
who was made up from
breeds milleniums ago

although shar pei look nothing
like them...they carry the web
toes not for ducks but for
walking on the snow to chase
game in winter

when she gets excited the yips
and high pitched voice is there
from the wolf line...no howling
thank god..

now i have to head off to work
a complex and stressful place
of the most brightest..and genius
mad scientist but fair boss
where i seem to fit in as the day
cleaner..

thank U for the comments Ladies

Mr gotta get his ass in gear
Mr Wolf!

author comment
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