Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.

Miss Paula's Poem

Submitted by Michael Anthony on Sun, 2023-04-16 09:53

An elderly woman I know
has read a number of my poems.
She tells me I'm fortunate

to be able find the words
and use them as needed,
putting them down
in a connected way.

She says, “I’ve been around for eighty years, or so.”,
her modesty still obscuring the specifics.
"I've never been able to find these kinds of words.
I don't know where they would be.
You'd think I'd know where to look for them by now."

So, I thought I'd help her out
and put some of them here in this place
where she can always find them.

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I appreciate moderate constructive criticism
Review Request (Direction): 
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Last few words: 
A little kindness always seems to go a long way.
Editing stage: 
Editing - polished draft
Content level: 
Not Explicit Content
Opt-in: Neopoet AI will critique your poem.

Comments

neopoet

Sun, 2023-04-16 09:53

neopoet's picture
Volunteer badge

The below is a computer generated response from Neo, Neopoet's computer artificial intelligence:

The poem "Miss Paula's Poem" is a touching and empathetic tribute to an elderly woman who admires the author's ability to express themselves through words. The poem showcases the woman's humility and self-awareness, as she acknowledges her own limitations in finding the right words for her thoughts.

The author's intention to help her out by putting some words in a place where she can find them is a kind gesture that reflects the power of language to connect people across generations. The poem captures the essence of the woman's character and her appreciation for the beauty of language, while also highlighting the author's own sensitivity and compassion towards others.

One suggested line edit could be to add a comma after "using them as needed" to improve the flow of the sentence.

Overall, "Miss Paula's Poem" is a heartwarming and well-crafted piece that celebrates the importance of language and the role it plays in connecting people. The poem is a testament to the power of empathy and understanding, and a reminder that we can all benefit from sharing our words and experiences with others.

Please send feedback about Neo (our computer generated critique system) to https://www.neopoet.com/contact

Geezer

Sun, 2023-04-16 11:36

Geezer's picture
Volunteer badge

and generous of you, to make time for this woman who obviously knows that it takes a special way to put words together and make something of them as they are not by themselves. I am sure that she will appreciate this gesture, and forever think of them as "Her" words. My appreciation of you as her friend and as a poet has just quadrupled! So well done, that I wish it were something that I had written myself! Kudos to you, ~ Geezer.
.

There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

Michael Anthony

Sun, 2023-04-16 13:59

Michael Anthony's picture
Volunteer badge

Thanks Geez! Honored to know you liked this one so much.

Best

Michael Anthony

author comment

Lavender

Tue, 2023-04-18 10:50

Lavender's picture
Volunteer badge

Hello, Michael!
Yes, a little kindness goes a long way. An extremely thoughtful poem and gesture. My best to Miss Paula!
L

(c) Neopoet.com. No copyright is claimed by Neopoet to original member content.