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The Eternal Question:who won
With minds that evolved
only yesterday,on this old earth
by the spectrum of time defined
by ourselves.
Sun blocked smoke filled skies
without breath in abundance,
crying eyes yet some rejoice saying
we have conquered,we are the strongest.
Strongest of what ? bricks?
Everywhere you look the result of
your strength intent on destroying yourselves.
Your flapping of nuclear birds
heard overhead, instead of bliss
filled winds that once were.
The eternal question remains who won.
These misguided gains and acid rain,
no one left to be conquered except ourselves.
Que.
str
Review Request (Intensity):
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing stage:
Content level:
Not Explicit Content
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Comments
Jackweb
Wed, 2022-08-03 09:41
Hello Que!
Your poem speaks of Russian- Ukraine conflict.
I liked the use of this metaphor:
Your flapping of nuclear birds*
heard overhead, instead of bliss
filled winds that once were.
Beautifully crafted piece!
.
"By virtue of creativity, my literary genre is poetry".
~Jackweb
Que
Wed, 2022-08-10 20:50
Thank you for your comment
Thank you for your comment and yes that is what it is in reference to.
author commentGeezer
Wed, 2022-08-03 11:16
Yes...
However, I think it speaks more to the world at large, rather than just the conflict with Russia and the Ukraine! I think that it relects upon humankind as a whole. "We are our own worst enemy." I too, was struck by the metaphor of:
"Your flapping of nuclear birds
heard overhead, instead of bliss
filled winds that once were."
Nice stuff! ~ Geezer.
.
There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.
Que
Wed, 2022-08-10 20:58
Thank you for your comment
Thank you for your comment and even though the war in with Russia is now being fought it does look at the wider nuclear threat that will affect us all, and when it"s all over what has really been proven except the fact that we are very good at trying to be the strongest of in the end nothing.
author commentCandlewitch
Thu, 2022-08-04 14:29
hello Que,
I feel your words of anger and sorrow. I think, as a species we are too stupid to live. it is painful...
*hugs, Cat
*
When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.
Que
Wed, 2022-08-10 21:03
Hey Cat thank you for your
Hey Cat thank you for your response and yes the thought of mankind being the smartest we have ever been the stupidity of the world right now.
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