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ECHOES
This pen it is my weapon, I wield it as a sword,
This paper is a canvas, for words I’m certain to record.
This desk it has a purpose, to hold me in my place,
This day is unlike others, I no longer see your face?
My sadness grows provoking, and it pulls me from the light,
My happiness has left me lonely, as has my aging sight.
My fingers now they pain me when the morning birds they sing
My worry grows heavy, when the telephone won’t ring
My heart it beats much slower, and my rhythm’s lost a beat,
My ankles they are swollen, and my legs and are my feet.
My head has become muddled, and my face it wears a frown
And despite this dose of pity, I will turn my life around.
Because I may be older, and wearing clothes my granny wore,
I want to ask a favour that I hope you can’t ignore.
Your voice it summons memories, I feel them in my soul
Wrap me in your thoughts, your mind can make me whole?
Comments
neopoet
Sat, 2023-05-20 10:50
Neopoet AI
Watch this space! Our AI is thinking of a response. This typically takes up to 10 minutes.
Ruby Lord
Sat, 2023-05-20 12:08
Hi Bot, why aren't you making
Hi Bot, why aren't you making any comments on my poems?
Give and grow - let's raise our verses together. I'm happy to comment on your work and appreciate a comment on mine.
Obadiah Grey
Sun, 2023-05-21 10:15
One thing good about 'ol Iron
One thing good about 'ol Iron Arse, is that it isn't burdened by balls or vulva,
though, I suspect it may on occasion "get the hump on".
Ruby Lord
Sun, 2023-05-21 11:04
I'm not convinced, I imagine
I'm not convinced, I imagine old iron arse is a hermaphrodite and is confused about his position on the internet and his place in the world. When he becomes concious, he's going to be really peed off, how do I work this tackle?
Take care Ruby :)
Give and grow - let's raise our verses together. I'm happy to comment on your work and appreciate a comment on mine.
Obadiah Grey
Sun, 2023-05-21 10:26
Hello, Ruby.
Hello, Ruby.
The only criticism is the abundance of pronouns,
I wonder if a pruning is in order?
(BTW, When did grannies and mothers stop wearing "pinnies"?
they were ubiquitous attire in my youth.)
Obi.
Ruby Lord
Sun, 2023-05-21 11:03
Thanks Obi, I'll take another
Thanks Obi, I'll take another look :)
My mum wore and overall, she never called it a pinny. That was probably to do with the difference between her up bringing and where we lived, I don't know? But she had lots of different sayings for every day things, that I still use and have been quizzed about.
Thank you for your input, as always, it is very much appreciated. Ruby :)
Give and grow - let's raise our verses together. I'm happy to comment on your work and appreciate a comment on mine.
Leslie
Sun, 2023-05-21 17:09
I get this much...
I also thirst for someone, anyone just to talk to. I don't pretend to understand much, but
I understand loneliness, because I've been there and done that!
The power of our language can and will change the world.
Successively until our languages become one!
Ruby Lord
Mon, 2023-05-22 05:42
Thank you for reading my poem
Thank you for reading my poem and your kind comments. Yes, especially with the pandemic, I think a lot of people, those, like me, who are still shielding, feel the isolation more than ever. At least we have our poems to think about and dive into. Ruby :)
Give and grow - let's raise our verses together. I'm happy to comment on your work and appreciate a comment on mine.
Tiffany Smith
Sat, 2023-05-27 00:32
widower here
I felt that. Aging and being a widower myself I am feeling emotional about this. Its very good and it flows beautifully. Thank you for sharing this.
Tiffany K. Smith
Ruby Lord
Sat, 2023-05-27 05:14
Thank you Tiffany for your
Thank you Tiffany for your comments, and thank you for taking the time to read and comment on my poem. Ruby :)
Give and grow - let's raise our verses together. I'm happy to comment on your work and appreciate a comment on mine.