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Dark Loch

Submitted by Keith Logan on Sat, 2017-07-22 05:43

'Twas when the moon was darkly hid
in blackness long ago,
strange sounds through startled waters slid
and echoed far below.

Astir illumed by lights of shore
behold a floating wreck;
within the flotsam, at its core,
an undulating neck.

Still holding firm three sailor lads,
sad victims of the storm;
though fearful yet, were very glad,
she kept them safe from harm.

Editing stage: 
Editing - rough draft

Comments

scribbler

Sat, 2017-07-22 12:52

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the water horse instead of a monster. Very nice short poem with an end twist. Just what I needed

Geezer

Sat, 2017-07-22 13:28

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that it was Nessie! Glad that it was just a water horse! Nessie has been known to be in a snit sometimes and I'm sure that I wouldn't want to meet her in the middle of a storm! I would put the comma after the word fearful and before yet. Nice work Keith.
~ Gee.
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Keith Logan

Sat, 2017-07-22 18:47

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The water horse sometimes called kelpie is identified in several different forms one of which is indeed Nessie.

Keith Logan
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author comment

lovedly

Sat, 2017-07-22 21:42

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A stir
was t a typo
Astir
i wonder Keith
long time since horses
came to my watershed

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