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Jetty

Submitted by Esker on Mon, 2012-03-12 15:54

awash in briny wake
my tale is sparce
these soaked foam
ravages from bitter
mouths that croak
as hungry cormorants
that trill

and how my shoulder
aches where we brothers
held our arms and wore
away the day like flesh
and lives that life did
make the meal for
deaths plate

(kettle is boiled
gotta go make coffee
take pain killers and
catch some sleep..
Was headed somewhere
with this poem...sorry)

Editing stage: 
Editing - rough draft

Comments

Nordic cloud

Mon, 2012-03-12 16:41

Nordic cloud's picture

I didn't know that cormorants trilled, there were such birds walking around the area where Joe lives, the remains of the Everglades still penetrating the housing estates, I saw one with a fish, and went closer to take a photo, it dropped its fish, and I, with difficulty threw the fish back into the water, a little 8" silvery fish, fish shaped!!!!

Love "wore away the day like flesh"
Have a good coffee, we have taken to having "Ettermiddags kaffè" Danish style now, Erik even bought a hand grinder and uses a new-fangled American filter system that takes ALL the grouts out so the coffee is clear ...and healthy.

AnnofNorway.

"The image of yourself which you see in a mirror Is dead,
but the reflection of the moon on water, lives." Kenzan.

Esker

Wed, 2012-03-14 21:52

Esker's picture

And I dont know if they trill I just threw that in there...
I had fun writing the beginning of this poem
I put a filter in a large cup with perc grounds
and pour water into the grounds to the cup
The filter gets damp and sticks to the rims
overwise it all just falls into the cup
and I have to wait for the grounds to settle

I think the cormorants in Ontario are not from
here originally but Im not sure...

Thank You!

author comment

Esker

Thu, 2012-03-15 00:07

Esker's picture

Everyone talking about the Leafs these days! "Those arent dents..Those are goals!" hurray!
I still remember the sound a puck makes on those cheap assed metal garage doors..
I might come back here and add something to this.. My attempt at an Epic peice
It was fun my freind

Kind of an homage to that style of writing

"Thanks for the comment friend!"

(Are there still some of us out here who remember "Peter" Puck??)

author comment

Esker

Thu, 2012-03-15 08:44

Esker's picture

Canadian Icon

I miss the old chats too! they were pretty fun
I guess the leafs being up there is why everyone
is talking about them down here in my city..
They are talking about the team like they did
in the old days when I was a kid! Say around
seventy five..Thats a long time ago! ha ha

author comment

Esker

Thu, 2012-03-15 23:32

Esker's picture

I remember the narration of the hockey announcer for Canadian games
all that emphasis and then the build of excitement as there were shots
on net and the organ music in the cavernous arenas and commercials
aired.... The camera angles and the simple hockey tableau without
the modern ads every where and the blue goalie crease..Even bored
in my room reading books while the winter storms creaked around
the dormers and the oil furnace rumbled far below I would tune in
with my little transistor radio and catch the announcer and listen
for a spell between chapters.. The hockey legends like heros of
old battling it out for that Stanley Cup!

author comment

loved

Thu, 2012-03-15 11:52

loved's picture

What will happen
if Neopoets
fail to read every bit of your
exotic poetry,
howsoever incomplete
that it originates
from the mind of the poet that you are,
it is in itself complete
let others do up the filling in,
as the trend with which you started
has been dissolved
in coffee pills

loved

Esker

Thu, 2012-03-15 17:09

Esker's picture

if this was the poet coffee shop
every one would find their table and others
I like the freedom to gather as travellers
not a troupe To set off and return with
fresh voyage visions

Im not everyones taste nor I theirs
as with all humans there are fave morsels
and even the ruin the haunted house
holds a love letter in a bureua read one
day by a voyeur traveller Which becomes
a ghost poem a love ballad
in a setting exotic
a scene tinged

amazing we are

author comment

loved

Thu, 2012-03-15 22:38

loved's picture

Your discourse
far surpasses the ability
of my cobwebbed
mind to catch.
Hence I take an indefinite sabbatical,
and shall meet at the voyeurs’ coffee table
perhaps someday....

loved

Esker

Thu, 2012-03-15 22:46

Esker's picture

Sounds like a poem Loved!
Poets are creatures of infinite discourse
we are garden dwellers
living in our cellars

with meals with our fellows
and our banquet of beggar treats
these words we seek
like soothing alms
and plaintive balms

author comment

loved

Thu, 2012-03-15 22:59

loved's picture

For many decades
my mind trades
in poetic words
my eyes do trace
and
still at the fag end of life
no poem have I created
worth its while
Albeit a life has not been wasted
I have to so many words
of ecstasy not tasted
shall perhaps ere I go
and
the winds of eternity
do Loved blow

loved

Esker

Thu, 2012-03-15 23:26

Esker's picture

we while away dear Loved
behind our machines modern
or ancient

How I miss the mechanical marvel
of the typewriter
How alone I wrote my poems from
the teen y ears to late 2004 when
I went "electric" and began to use
the computer like everyone

your poems are status of work
presented and your comments are
abstract marvels of poetic discourse
that blaze as a fag y ou say in the
thick of night Brilliant exclamations
that I find worth their glow and fervant
worth

much my while Loved
mych my while!!

author comment

loved

Thu, 2012-03-15 23:39

loved's picture

How I wish my friendly critiques read you to improve their
own verbosity and degradability
and
improve upon, their very own
desired positivity

T H A N K S...
your poems are status of work
presented and your comments are
abstract marvels of poetic discourse
that blaze as a fag you say, in the
thick of night Brilliant exclamations
that I find worth their glow and fervent
worth

much my while Loved
Much my while!!

loved

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