Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.

babycakes

Submitted by Esker on Tue, 2012-04-17 22:57

weep little sweet
the poisons in the treat
that ol junkdogs in heat
cause shes the bitch
that bites the witchs
thats serves the snitchs

and in her soiled knuckel locked
holster
is the courage feist that bolsters
slick eyed race
that cuts a trace

babycakes
gurl
you done gone
and set this town
awhirl

Editing stage: 
Editing - rough draft

Comments

weirdelf

Wed, 2012-04-18 22:43

weirdelf's picture
Volunteer badge

I don't know what to say. A successful experiment, a good poem.

Better than that... I know! You are telling a story, in your own inimical way! Woohoo, unusual for you.

cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry

Esker

Wed, 2012-04-25 14:32

Esker's picture

yes..this is correct Elf!

author comment

Nordic cloud

Thu, 2012-04-19 11:01

Nordic cloud's picture

Oh the doggie girl
the sandwich
and the sweet candied thoughts
with underskirt currents
and poisoned with witches knuckles
feisted, lurched,

what was that,
passing between us there?
I didn't see.

Nordic in a cloud

"The image of yourself which you see in a mirror Is dead,
but the reflection of the moon on water, lives." Kenzan.

Esker

Wed, 2012-04-25 14:33

Esker's picture

magic in the sleight of this
the slate of fog
and its misted breath
written on silver backed meaning.....

author comment
(c) Neopoet.com. No copyright is claimed by Neopoet to original member content.