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Freedom
When the wind is you
when you see just through
when the sun is your blood
when the sea is your guard
when your heart sings of joy
when there is nothing to destroy
Review Request (Intensity):
I appreciate moderate constructive criticism
Editing stage:
Content level:
Not Explicit Content
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Comments
Lavender
Tue, 2023-01-03 16:03
Freedom
Amen to this, Anna.
L
Rosewood Apothecary
Wed, 2023-01-04 06:37
Very strong
Absolutely brilliant. I’d have a look at that last line.
“when there is no to destroy”
Try
“When there is nothing to destroy”
Or
“When there is naught to destroy”
Unless I’m missing some meaning or if “no” is being used as a noun.
Otherwise perfect,
Tim
Anna Severchuk
Mon, 2023-01-30 09:17
Well,thank you.corrected.
Well,thank you.corrected.
Candlewitch
Wed, 2023-01-04 07:18
dear Anna,
good thoughts are like the air we breathe! great job!
*hugs, Cat
*
When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.
Anna Severchuk
Mon, 2023-01-30 09:17
Thank you!
Thank you!