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HOME MOVIES-- edited
HOME MOVIES
Home movies black and white
faded celluloid 1940s
16 millimeter dry and brittle
flickering through time
a blinding light
and we splice a life
back together
again...
empty reflections
of yesterdays
flickering through time
Editing stage:
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Comments
Kailashana2
Thu, 2012-07-05 08:35
Try to find another word(s)
Try to find another word(s) instead of *soulless*. Maybe omit it if you can't.
Well, my opinion anyway, it's too redundant, and overused in poetry. Otherwise, this is another poem that rates another look. ;-)
~A
Geremia
Thu, 2012-07-05 11:57
ok "soulless" is gone to
ok "soulless" is gone to "empty''
Geremia
Thu, 2012-07-05 11:53
ok "souless" is gone to
ok "souless" is gone to "empty''
Ian.T
Fri, 2012-07-06 03:50
Joe
A good theme and well presented Anna's change seems to have worked as it read OK,
Yours Ian.T
PS:- hope you are coping with things, the children send their unconditional love, Sadie and friends
.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..
Geremia
Fri, 2012-07-06 06:48
Barely functional at times.
Barely functional at times. wheel chsir most of timr. sick from meds ,but I LOOK DAMN GOOD. Go figure.:)
Kailashana2
Fri, 2012-07-06 09:39
It's been said that nature
It's been said that nature abhors a vacuum. Your Gerimia-ness remains intact. Think of all the ugly people who are well enough. rofl.
Geremia
Fri, 2012-07-06 10:06
i guess.
i guess.