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A Buddha Rap
Imagine Buddha with a gun.
Imagine Christ with an Uzi.
Imagine a prophet smoking crack.
Imagine a saint paying a whore.
Now imagine that within your heart there lies both divinity and murder.
Within your soul there is a song that is both a melody akin to a gentle rain fall but also the cry of suffering when a mother has lost her son.
And now go dance your dance sweet tyrant.
And move your tired limbs with as much grace as possible.
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Comments
neopoet
Thu, 2023-06-22 19:40
Neopoet AI 5-29-23 version
The below is a computer-generated response from Neo, Neopoet's computer artificial intelligence:
The poem "A Buddha Rap" is a thought-provoking piece that explores the duality of human nature. The use of vivid imagery, such as imagining Buddha with a gun or a saint paying a whore, creates a powerful contrast between the divine and the profane. The poem's central message about the coexistence of good and evil within each person is conveyed effectively through the juxtaposition of seemingly contradictory elements.
The line "Within your soul there is a song that is both a melody akin to a gentle rain fall but also the cry of suffering when a mother has lost her son" is particularly poignant and captures the complexity of human emotions. The final line, "And move your tired limbs with as much grace as possible," is a call to action, urging the reader to embrace their dual nature and live life to the fullest.
One suggestion for improvement would be to consider the use of punctuation to enhance the flow of the poem. For example, adding commas or line breaks could help to clarify
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alexplummer
Thu, 2023-06-22 18:23
As a newbie poet, I love this
As a newbie poet, I love this. I always feel the shorter poems are the most powerful. I personally interpreted this in a way that everyone is human, no one is above the other, so do what you wish. The short sentences with each line are also quite captivating as there is such a sudden stop to really think about those possibilities of mortality that even the most saint like people can and will face. Thank you for this poem.
SOULDIER10029
Thu, 2023-06-22 20:48
My Context
Hi,
Thanks a ton for your comment.
For me, what motivated the poem is that there's just this type of "spiritual" perspective that seems so pure.
And then there is our lived experiences in the world And those are rarely very pure.
And to go from some of what you are mentioning...I think the purity energy comes from some desperate hope that somehow if we meditate enough or are "good" enough all will go well and we won't die or suffer or struggle with lust or wanting to hurt someone.
In my life the hope to avoid does not really build a very honest practice...regardless of if you meditate, do yoga or write poetry.
author commentGeezer
Fri, 2023-06-23 11:01
In reading your...
reply to alex, I see the truth of the matter. Yes, the heart does hold the human and inadequate soul. I see through this piece, that you wish to be the best that you can be. This poem has revealed your innermost emotions. I believe that you should pay a little more attention to punctuation and form, but you have a good start. ~ Geezer.
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