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Sick Again…First Stanza (round robin)

My tongue sits in my mouth
like a boulder in a granite quarry
Hardened and dry, like caustic lime
My head pounds and rings out
Like a steel worker’s three pound hammer
On the rivets of the Chrysler building
I check myself for head trauma
I find nothing but self inflicted misery
Vague memories of triple hopped I.P.A.
Icy tumbler of Glenlivet like citrine glows
Up on its soapbox making bad noise
Twelve years in it’s barrel, half a day late for work…

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
How does this theme appeal to you?
Last few words: 
Ok. This was harder than I thought it would be. Hopefully you’ve all had hangovers? I had one every morning for 20 years. This was my life.
Editing stage: 
Content level: 
Not Explicit Content

Comments

I wondered what I will do.
This starts off like too many hits off a powered bong lol
Half a day late for work - good one.
I suppose we carry on with the first letter of each line capped.
Hmm...
Later,
Mark

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A few nights I have had that turned into long days...I am up next so here it goes...

Join in our collaborative poem workshop. Each member will have a chance to write two stanzas at least four lines each. The stanzas must be relative to the poem.

"My tongue sits in my mouth
like a boulder in a granite quarry
Hardened and dry, like caustic lime
My head pounds and rings out
Like a steel worker’s three pound hammer"

It adds to the elegance of the writing.
It adds dept to the sentence and and gives the reader a sense of awe.

Different types of figures of speech in English are used for expressing different meanings.

This is an integral part of the English language and can be found in poetry, oral literature and even in everyday conversations. For eye-catching purposes and also for adding humour.

Apt and yet beautiful!
.

"Poetic license
gives
the poets
the free will to
embroider a good tale
and deviate from the established rules of language"~Jackweb

those days at all! I especially like the reference to:
"checking myself for head trauma" and the mention
of "half a day late for work". That cost me a couple of jobs.
No doubt about it, sick again, is the pits! Nice work
I almost had to check myself for head trauma! ~ Geez.
.

It seems that the days and hours that people
are available for chatroom are staggered and
not a good match for most everyone. How about
if everyone just shows up at the door, whenever
they have a few free minutes?

I really liked the IPA (does that mean India Pale Ale?) very good job!

*hugs, Cat

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And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.

It was my everything. I love the bitterness of the hops. Hops and cannabis are closely related so the terpenes in hops are slightly psychedelic. I used to drink 4-12 daily and then smoke cannabis inducing an altogether more intense and psychoactive drunk. The urban dictionary calls this behavior “greening out”. It gives you the spins/nausea. I’m currently 7 years sober.

Tim

author comment

On your sobriety. A huge accomplishment!

Join in our collaborative poem workshop. Each member will have a chance to write two stanzas at least four lines each. The stanzas must be relative to the poem.

congratulations!

*hugs, Cat

When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.

Dunno why - but still..
Ya gotta control it...
lol
Mark

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