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Sadly

Submitted by Barbara Writes on Sat, 2012-03-10 21:33

Sadly

sadly time never lies
when love sprouts then dies
in thorny hearts

sadly truths gets hidden
when deceit takes root
in dishonest words

sadly life gets rougher
going gets tougher
when faces turn their back on you

be true to self
when a fall is shameful
stand tall walk in integrity

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing stage: 
Editing - rough draft

Comments

wesley snow

Sun, 2012-03-11 16:03

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You marked "structured Eastern". What sort of poetic form is this? I understand haiku. Beyond that I'm lost.
Oh, and by the way, just as I pegged it... Not a single typo in the whole poem. It's exactly what you intended to have read. wesley

W. H. Snow

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Barbara Writes

Sun, 2012-03-11 19:23

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I have no idea whey eadtrn or western form is. I click it to see if any fir know

Thanks glad it turn out as you pegged lol

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loved

Sun, 2012-03-11 19:32

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A poet's impression
individual and a personal conception
well transformed in any form
yours is

loved

Barbara Writes

Sun, 2012-03-11 21:16

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You comment is refreshing.

*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.

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loved

Mon, 2012-03-12 01:46

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in duplicate I find
Thanks BW

loved

Barbara Writes

Sun, 2012-03-11 21:17

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Your comment is welcoming

*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.

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scribbler

Sun, 2012-03-11 22:26

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A good statement of self reliance. For indeed we can often only count on ourselves in times of turmoil. Ithink in line 8 maybe going gets tougher might read a bit better................stan

Ian.T

Mon, 2012-03-12 03:42

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East or West it matters not, I looked at this piece as there were comments about which Hemisphere it came from and thought that to be exact each of your stanzas would make a lovely Haiku then you would be pure Eastern Promise lol.
As it is it is a well written piece, so not to worry about its Gender, lol,
Yours Ian.T

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Barbara Writes

Mon, 2012-03-12 10:01

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Some insight into hemispheric poetry
Your comment is welcoming

*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.

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Barbara Writes

Mon, 2012-03-12 09:51

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Of course you are right
My brain flip flopped on that one
the reading was a bit off, but instead of lamenting too long, I went ahead and posted
Glad you noticed and point out

*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.

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