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LIghting grace
Finding the favor of a new start
with a process flowing down stream
emotions like love, comfort and passion became
a mainstay for returning to a human with life.
My mother passed oh very hard to accept
three years pass and my daughter died being only 30.
Parts of my soul were healing at a slower rate.
Years passed age of life were differences in health.
Maybe thirty years left before going home
with the thought of my final place of rest
receiving lighting grace.
l
Style / type:
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity):
I appreciate moderate constructive criticism
Editing stage:
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Comments
Esker
Fri, 2016-06-10 04:55
mortality the keystone of empathy
losses
comforts
wandering in the hurt
daze
i did it
went through it
I like how U use lightnin
as a definitive
clause in understanding
of an awakening
thank U!
judyanne
Fri, 2016-06-10 07:43
hello Betty
Welcome to neopoet
i really like your write - it is quite emotive
but it reads to me somewhat more like prose than poetry
(Please know that this is in my opinion only - I'm no expert on free form poetry)
Just me - I would cull it somewhat
the favor of a new start
flowing down stream
love, comfort and passion became
a mainstay
in the return to humanity
within three years
the passing of both
my mother and daughter
parts of my soul
healing at a slower rate
with the thought of my final place of rest
Home - receiving lighting grace
Love judy
xxx
'Each for the joy of the working, and each, in his separate star,
shall draw the Thing as he sees It, for the God of Things as They are.'
(Rudyard Kipling)