Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.

Forgotten

She was a stay at home mom
empowering her children for success
she forewent challenges of the workforce
for her family; she worked from home.

Obstacles were many; freedom was golden
calls came in; her kids were problematic
the fruits of her womb are finding success
she's isolated, watching, in her empty nest.

She's all alone on her journey through winter
her hair slowly adorns silver, losing teeth
she braces up for the storm that's brewing
against her once she's in her senior years.

She has no regrets; she stands by her decision
selfless sacrifices disrespected, trampled on
she waits, watches, listens for the call; mama
they always need something, mama needs nothing.

Lonely, isolated, feeling unloved she makes no demands
living on social media, she keeps up with news and technology.

Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Last few words: 
I'm working hard on grammar. How did I do?
Editing stage: 

Comments

This is the best and affecting I have read of yours.
I don't know how it would read to those who don't know your work.
Let's see.

cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry

Coming from you that's a high compliment. Makes me know my hard work is paying off

*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.

Neopoet Community

author comment

so mature and with your style barbara
and personal steadfast character...

I like your work because its so close to
my Lady and I...
my baby aint perfect and we go through
our struggles here
and she aint easy to live with
or I..
but overall she is more self sacrificing
of all and the kids are moved on now
...and she did take em on..
help em out...
and they just seemed to
want to be something
made up....
not the way they were raised

and she plans her gardens
regardless and plans her
place here..what paints
when this storm blows
over for the halll
bathroom
and Im fighting the front lines
taking the hits and losing
most of the times
and my r and r is working
on this place
and writing here...

I like your writing because
i give her a hard time
because shes so quiet
so your voice is too me
what she must be thinking
feeling about me sometimes
...
cept I know I try hard to understand
and please her
but that dont mean you can live with
someone rightly
nor does it mean u are their
type of hero deep inside
...
excellent poem Barbara

thank u
Esker~

The insight through your poetry and the tidbit you just shared tells me your are a loving kind person. I can't imagine you're as self centered, spiteful and evil as this control freak I'm dealing with.

*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.

Neopoet Community

author comment

it is not my full way..but I can be which makes me worse
which is why your writes are important for they show me how
others view me...
I bear it out now
finallly and try to not be like this
and yet others are truly the devil incarnate

thank U Barbara !

And you're welcome

*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.

Neopoet Community

author comment

One of the best, your words as usual have so much meaning that comes from the heart,
Yours as always, Ian..

.
Give critique to help keep Neopoet great.
Unconditional love to you all.
"Learn to love yourself first"
Yours as always, Ian.T, Sparrow, and Yenti

Sometimes things are so heavy on my heart I must put it to poetry. A dear and close friend told me once he expected to see me on the ifle tower with a rifle and to just write. Lol
I'm glad I'm writing better poetry. Sometimes hard work and never giving up brings blessing and answers to wishes, hopes and dreams before we die haha.

*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.

Neopoet Community

author comment
(c) Neopoet.com. No copyright is claimed by Neopoet to original member content.