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The Blooming Sides of My Love
She sits right beside me
Delicate and earnest
Her stunning hair flowing
Like flowers in the breeze
And I believe that she is
More romantic than a rose
Puts on more charms than orchids
Expresses more passion than marigolds
And she is outright more beautiful
Than calla lilies
Though all these things I say
Are true to the naked eye
But one will not know
That she is more unstable than dahlias
For monkshood flowers should be present
Wherever she is
Phlox are sweet dreams
While she is a nightmare
She is a more enticing poison to me
Than an oleander
And has no antidote
Just like the autumn crocus
Style / type:
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity):
I appreciate moderate constructive criticism
Review Request (Direction):
[This option has been removed]
Last few words:
This is a poem that I wrote in how I feel about a particular girl. I am not sure whether or not I am going in the right direction with it. Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated!
Editing stage:
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Comments
mand
Fri, 2013-12-20 17:23
Hi Larkspur
This is just amazing poetry! You have an in depth knowledge of plants and the effects that they have and then you cleverly relate them to the characteristics of the object of your desire! This is a bitter sweet and dangerous relationship - she is like poison ( and yet sooo beautiful and enticing ) Still she is irresistible. This relationship will end in disaster, but it will be passionate and beautiful while it lasts. I love the play on words ( for the title ).
I have to do a little research ( with regard the plants ) but it was well worth the effort.
Well done
LOve Mand xxxxxx