spinning top peace..

I had a spinning top once
believing it would spin forever

But as hard as I pushed
it always
stopped

so soon it never span again
as a child

I couldn’t understand
now I do

at last, peace

awake the fear
scratching at the door
that thin sliver hall
light
the dusted carpet tired

outside the night is restless
an airport beacon turns
and runs its white tongue
upon the clouds

and the hydro transformer sizzles
in the damp mists falling

I can feel my soul
sitting in the chair
watching me as I toss
and I know the mirror
will play another role

the open mouth of the drain
will taunt me with its darling
sigh

used to see in black and white
now i see red
no one remembers
anything i said
and the rain is falling harder on my head
lucky right now i don't mind getting wet

wish i could say
in time it will be better
it's getting to where now
it's now or never
if only i could see her number on the phone
i'd understand if you said come back, come home
(chorus)
tell me i'm not good enough to have you
i'll take my heart and break it in two

What drives my battered auto
down the highway, straight to hell
is an engine fueled with regular hope
that everything goes well

The gas gauge doesn't work
I'm riding with low brakes
Searching for reverse
the steering-wheel... It shakes

This car is possessed by demons
I am almost sure
No mechanic's gonna fix it
for worn out, there is no cure

It reeks of body odors
there's coffee-cups and trash
Seats are ripped, the windows dirty
hood is crumpled from a crash

There are doors in the antechamber.
There is the always-choice to walk through any
one of them.
There are signs above the doors, a
warning to the effectiveness of being
affected.
But if it isn't known now, it will be known
sooner than later--if any door is opened,
even a little, little enough will be enough
because
nothing
will ever be the same.

You're a bitch babe
Sucking me dry
Believe me honey not in good way.
bitter regret and bile seeps from your  pores.

When we first met you were a vibrant
Temptress a dusky beauty,
Now your are miserable old hag
Humourless and aged 
 Has old Booze Hound really been that bad?

Now this pretty little ditty is over
I turn over in bed and you have gone
I miss you and your dulcet tones
You old crone 

The glamour for change
The face of uncertainty
The search for a messiah
Warranted by our sorry state
Tilted will of people in battle
With self-proclaimed patriots
Craving for glory and power
Phantom bubbles of leadership

First African American
Our erstwhile Goodluck
The people began to wonder
Insecurity and job lost
Loosing homes
Leading to occupy cities
Questions are many
Answers are few

falling
ideals
in their beauty

poetry sliding
across the mind
like damp snowflakes
on wet eyelids

cast yourself
on your city shadows
your black temple doorways
the lilting sway

hold my arm
and in your room
you bathe in lights
that speak
and wander
in hurt visions
everylasting

hunger for little
and regard more

how you love the
gaunt saints you
follow in soup kitchen
gathering

your glass repository
resins musks
and ointments

i guess
i'm never gonna sleep tonight
never gonna get it right
lost me in the sound of my only escape

and the
bass is getting louder
treble take me higher
singing myself wings maybe i'll fly away

(chorus)
and i'd beg
for someone to follow
would my life get any easier?
no i'll never be like her
but how?
they said just talk it out
how do you expect our ways to change
when he can't even look at me

This is how long an old man feels,
This is how long he awaits your smile.
Each moment locked away
In some distant and perished file.
Cold mornings creep,
Break of dawns crisp and slick
Finding me cold in bed
I wonder if one moment can
Extend my sleep.

Forever and a day fallen,
Ghosts visit
Family plagues,
Dreams allow,
Sorrow lives,
In solitude I confine.
Live and breathe
Heartbroken I scream
Ancient arisen
Seeking a paper heart,
A heart he simply chooses not to forget.