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W O U N D E D
was it the perfection
that was shattered
the worlds whimper
suffer the day
the brilliant occurence
these gifts
receieved
overlay my life with
dark eclipse
with one step in the darkness
and the other in the light
I fill the vision coffers
and speak the hopes
fire
this blaze
held trust
alive and well
and yet
Ive been dead before
been lost
and been found
Editing stage:
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Comments
weirdelf
Sat, 2011-11-19 20:47
your poetry is still full of imagery and emotion,
but it is not what it was when your were orgami. You have lost the gestalt.
cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry
weirdelf
Sat, 2011-11-19 20:47
your poetry is still full of imagery and emotion,
but it is not what it was when your were orgami. You have lost the gestalt.
cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry
Esker
Mon, 2011-11-21 09:51
world away....
moving in transition
from the shelter realm
to the new
the wasteland ruin
examination
and the winter
yet not arriving here
with its winds
and its snows
the cold rains
I welcome it
giving flavour to the
new bold era
a new dreamplace
weirdelf
Mon, 2011-11-21 10:31
Finding a new voice in your poetry is excruciatingly difficult
I honour your courage my brother.
cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry
Esker
Mon, 2011-11-21 10:41
Thanks Weird
!