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I love you
Let it come
let it come
there's nothing can stop me
you lousy bum
Your threats and lies are fatuous cries
for help in your own ineptitude
so come my way
I'll have my say
it might not even hurt,
though chances are
my answers curt
will cos you pause
and that's because
you have nothing to give.
Yet I love you,
as I love a harmless bunny showing fangs
and your toothless harangues
Review Request (Intensity):
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing stage:
(c) Neopoet.com. No copyright is claimed by Neopoet to original member content.
Comments
Bonitaj
Mon, 2011-11-21 09:55
Jess!
No matter how you pitch this one, I suspect you're going to raise someone's ire! The proof of this pudding is in the eating though! Let's see you sup with your subject!)
Clever write!
Boni
Bonitaj
weirdelf
Mon, 2011-11-21 10:27
what can I say?
I never ever write direct responses to other people's poems on Neopoet, but this was inspired by a fisherperson.
cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry
Kailashana2
Mon, 2011-11-21 10:09
Hey, the rabbit died. And
Hey, the rabbit died. And somehow that is and isn't funny, you scallywag.
;-)
weirdelf
Mon, 2011-11-21 10:29
rabbits that sink their fangs into sharks
usually die. Sad but true.
I'm a ratbag through and through,
but a caring one.
cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry
Kailashana2
Mon, 2011-11-21 12:25
You'd like to think so, Jess.
You'd like to think so, Jess. I'm here to tell you that what you do is not half as debilitating and crippling as those of us who pander to one another. Pat each other on the back instead of giving 100% of ourselves. Just for the sake of *friendship*.
Friends like that I don't want. Sometimes friendship means a lots of mutual work. Some of it painful and unpleasant. Some of it downright scary because we have to face our own demons.
~A
Geezer
Mon, 2011-11-21 16:21
Wow!...
I thought I was at open mike night! Maybe you could be the next big rap-star! Pretty good for a ratbag. LOL Good one, ~ Gee
There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.
loved
Thu, 2011-12-01 23:16
This is the maiden one
of yours I've read
and
enjoyed the fillip
but felt sad...
why i hadn't read you earlier
I too could have become
a poetic scholar.
No.of course no
I won't post it ...
as a poem
you advised me not to
ever do so...
loved