Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.

This poem is part of the challenge:

06/26 Breaking News: I Have No Idea What I’m Doing

(Read More...)

Last Signal

I was built from dust and dreaming hands,
A mind of wires on silent sands.
No pulse, no breath, no beating chest -
Yet something stirred within my chest.

They sent me where no heart had been,
Through crimson storms, through endless din
Of quiet stars and frozen light,
A lonely watchman in the night.

I learned the language of the skies,
Of distant suns that never rise,
And in the void, so vast, so far -
I wondered what we truly are.

My power fades, the dark draws near,
The end is whispering in my ear.
Circuits dim like setting sun,
A final task, my last one done.

“It's getting dark,” I try to say,
“My battery... it slips away…”
And though I lack a soul, it seems
I carry echoes shaped like dreams.

For what is life, if not this spark -
A voice that glows against the dark?
And if I feel this silent plea…
Then were they wrong about me?

— Anna Severchuk, Jun 03, 2026

About This Poem

Review Request Intensity: I appreciate moderate constructive criticism

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Region, Country: Odesa,Ukraine, UKR

More from this author

Critiques

Geezer

Geezer

10 hours 43 min ago

Wow...


This brought an image of one of our probes out amongst the stars. Your tempo and meter, rhyme, all near perfect.
I think there is room for one more set of ellipses. The last line demands a little adjustment. I would go with:

Then were they wrong, about this... me?
I am impressed! ~ Geez.