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TIME OF CHANGE (Sept. contest)
I think back and I recall
early September leaves
unbrushed yet by paints of fall
just here and there a poplar's tease.
In days when I was strong and lean
with scarce hints of coming age,
like aging leaves retaining their green
with autumn awaiting back stage.
Then as its wont these times, too passed
the foliage tinted by cool air
my hair turned white then loose fast
spring's blush forgotten way back there.
At last came September's end
summer become mere memory
with the first touch of true chill wind
bringing thoughts of coming cold to me.
Style / type:
Structured: Western
Review Request (Intensity):
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing stage:
Contest:
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Comments
wesley snow
Wed, 2015-09-09 15:59
First the typo...
the (the) foliage tinted by cool air
It was a walk with you into autumn.
W. H. Snow
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scribbler
Wed, 2015-09-09 20:08
Hi wes
I recall the Sept. of my years when the first hints of coming age showed themselves. Always goos to have you walk along..........stan
author commentSparrow
Wed, 2015-09-09 18:52
Stan
A fine example for the others to follow, lovely time of the year, and I think that I will have to paint another picture before the end of the month.
I feel that it is a beaut time of the year so full of changes that arrive so fast one after another I can hear the leaves starting to break away in their autumn coats,
Yours Ian..
.
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Unconditional love to you all.
"Learn to love yourself first"
Yours as always, Ian.T, Sparrow, and Yenti
scribbler
Wed, 2015-09-09 20:10
Hey Ian
It's a toss up to me between autumn and winter. I guess I just can't appreciate summer seen through a cascade of sweat lol.........stan
author commentBarbara Writes
Mon, 2015-09-14 20:24
Wonderful poem
The tumblerling of summer to fall in September. Love the rhyming in tone.
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scribbler
Tue, 2015-09-15 11:51
Hi Barb
Thank you. Late summer throughout winter are my favorite times of year.......stan
author commentlovedly
Mon, 2015-09-14 20:29
Stan I
have dared to post my piece
along with stalwarts like thee
hope some one will
at least read me
unlike your poetry
you are the tree
I a leaf
and many autumns
we have seen
like dawns remember Stan
but leaves must fall
we all have seen....
still I maybe a leaf
just sticking to a lonely tree
till snow beats me
snow here means
Snowman
scribbler
Tue, 2015-09-15 11:53
Hi loved
I guess it's pretty clear I like using nature in describing the things we humans go through. Thanks for dropping by........stan
author commentlovedly
Tue, 2015-09-15 15:45
and thanks go to u Stan
thank u Stan
natures only
man
Sparrow
Tue, 2015-09-15 19:16
Loved
Have you forgotten that if there were no leaves then the tree would die, we are all part of the whole just remember that,
Yours Ian..
.
Give critique to help keep Neopoet great.
Unconditional love to you all.
"Learn to love yourself first"
Yours as always, Ian.T, Sparrow, and Yenti