Ray Bear

Member since March 24, 2026

Member for 2 months, 10 days

The Dead Mesa Requiem

Posted Jun 3, 2026 · 60 lines · 1 critiques

A decade passed since weary lawmen died,
to guard the gold that locked itself inside.
A curse was laid upon the lonely hill,
To keep the hidden treasure dark and still.

The midnight sun is bleeding low and red,
across a silent valley of the dead.
He pulls his heavy brimmed hat to his eyes,
as black crows scream their warnings to the skies.

The map is cracked and rotted down with mold,
a scrap of flesh that speaks of Spanish gold.
The ink is dark, like dried and vanished veins,
of men who died in heavy iron chains.

He spurs his horse through canyon walls of stone,
where frozen, blackened water falls alone.

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The mesa rises like a jagged tooth,
to hide the ancient treasure and the truth.

Inside the mine, the gold is shining bright,
a trap of glittering and cursed light.
But shadows stretch and slowly start to crawl,
along the rotted timber of the wall.

The lawman stands above them, seven feet,
where dust and midnight shadows start to meet.
His skin is leather, stripped and sun-bleached dried,
with nothing but a hollow void inside.

A silver star is pinned to rotted bone,
his jaw is carved of scorched desert stone.
He wears a heavy coat of faded hide,
with ash and smoke alive and trapped inside.

Two burning embers stare from empty eyes,
reflecting cold and cruel winter skies.
He draws a heavy pistol made of steel,
to seal the awful doom the living feel.

The cowboy freezes with his hand on hip,
a silent prayer escapes his trembling lip.
The hammer clicks, the seconds slowly freeze,
the air locks tight without a sudden breeze.

He fires fast, a blinding, sudden flash,
the monster turns to smoke and harmless ash.
The cowboy laughs and claims his heavy prize,
with greedy hunger burning in his eyes.

He grabs the chest of cursed Spanish gold,
but suddenly his living blood runs cold.
His fingers turn to grey and heavy rust,
his leather boots begin to melt to dust.

He tries to scream but sharp ice fills his chest,
as mortal thoughts are violently suppressed.
He feels his mind dissolve into the stone,
to rule this dark and tragic vault alone.

The silver star falls down upon the floor,
as phantom wind blows through the open door.
He takes his place inside the heavy gloom,
the new protector of the silent tomb.

The cowboy’s bones now guard the ancient gold,
beneath the mountain, dark and bitter cold.
Above his head, deep in the solid stone,
a final warning stands and waits alone:

"The shadows wrap your throat and choke you in,
to pay the heavy price of greed and sin.
No grave will mark the place where you must dwell,
you are the phantom and the prison cell."

Ray Bear’s timeline

June 2026
03 Wed

Posted a poem
The Dead Mesa Requiem
"A decade passed since weary lawmen died,"
Open thread 60 lines
May 2026
31 Sun

Contest commendation
05/26 New Member Contest

with "The Embers Burn Low ".
28 Thu

Received a critique
on The Unanswered Glow from @Sen99
"You have made me think with this gripping narrative poem Why should I have s landline ? I have hardly made any calls I just receive spam 📞 Then I read this a phone is like a lifeline keep open Well scribed again Sen99"
28 Thu

Received a critique
on The Unanswered Glow from @Geezer
"I would like to remind everyone that if you see a comment or response that you find especially good, you should tap that little heart button in the comment section and watch it turn red! This is to help let the commente…"
27 Wed

Received a critique
on The Unanswered Glow from @Geezer
"go way back. I was just a kid when I saw House on Haunted Hill and Pit and the Pendulum, and his voice gave me chills. I followed his career as an orator and was amazed at the depth of his voice. He made you want each l…"
27 Wed

Critiqued
"We Laugh Instead" by @Wallyroo92
"Life's like that sometimes regards Ray"
27 Wed

Received a critique
on My Liquid Eden from @Wallyroo92
"Great rhyme and flow, all around. It keeps the reader engaged, especially with that amazing flow. Well done."
27 Wed

Received a critique
on A Glitch in the Tapestry from @Wallyroo92
"It's interesting that sometimes we capture something we can't explain or that our brain is analyzing the subtle things others won't notice. Nice work here."
27 Wed

Received a critique
on Gamble for your Life from @Wallyroo92
"Loved the intrigue and atmosphere you set up here, and those closing lines are very tense with the outcome as a result of the game. Awesome rhyme scheme and flow from beginning to end. Well done."
27 Wed

Received a critique
on The Unanswered Glow from @Geezer
"hear in my inner mind's ear, one of my all-time favorite orators, Vincent Price reading this! I beg to disagree with the A.I.'s call on "plastic spine" and "buzzing line." I think it adds to the hostility of interruptio…"
27 Wed

Received a critique
on The Hunt from @Geezer
"I do suppose that my remarks could have come across that way. I failed to recognize that my sarcasm may proceed me. I AM sarcastic and sometimes fail to see that it might have a deleterious effect on my overall commenti…"
26 Tue

Posted a poem
The Unanswered Glow
"The screen lights up the darkened room:"
Open thread 38 lines
26 Tue

Posted a poem
The Hunt
"Dawn breaks like a bloodshot eye,"
Open thread 14 lines
23 Sat

Critiqued
"drops of heaven" by @Flower Girl
"The cadence here is lovely. You’ve perfectly captured that quiet, wondrous magic of nature and renewal. Thanks for sharing this piece of peace! Regards Ray"
23 Sat

Critiqued
"jeong" by @crypticbard
"Well done, the line about the body avoiding the kitchen island out of habit rather than longing is brilliant. You’ve perfectly captured how grief and memory live in our muscle memory long after a routine changes. Beauti…"
22 Fri

Critiqued
"The Calliope Played" by @William Lynn
"This is absolutely stunning. You’ve captured that bittersweet, aching nostalgia of youth so perfectly. The imagery of the carnival lights blinking awake like fireflies and the town shrinking beneath the Ferris wheel fee…"
22 Fri

Critiqued
"Today " by @Eric Clausen
"This is incredibly raw and powerful. The progression from isolation and burning anger into that heavy, hollow exhaustion is so relatable. That line about the "question stones" grinding into dust perfectly captures the w…"
21 Thu

Critiqued
"Carnival NIght" by @Karriss Carey-ivory
"Love this! It starts out so magical and sweet, and then that plot twist at the end hits you like a bad mix of fairy floss and gravity. Perfect ending! 😂🎡 regards Ray"
21 Thu

Critiqued
"as memory fades" by @crypticbard
""Hours of toil simmer away in rivulets of forgetfulness." What a gorgeous, heavy line. The pacing of this perfectly mirrors the rain cascading down. Beautiful tribute to hard work and quiet release. Regards Ray"
21 Thu

Critiqued
"Sweet the rain fall" by @poetaldo
"A brilliant depiction of sensory overload and eventual peace. The water feels like a total reset from the oppressive heat and the weight of the crowd's stares. Beautifully structured as a full loop of a day. Beautifully…"
20 Wed

New follower
@Summer Days
19 Tue

Posted a poem
The Severed Wings of Midnight
"The golden sun is but a heavy chain,"
Open thread 16 lines
13 Wed

Posted a poem
Heaven or Hell
"Damnation"
Open thread 30 lines
12 Tue

Posted a poem
Turquoise Shadows
"The water breathes a heavy, leaden sigh,"
Open thread 18 lines
10 Sun

Posted a poem
Gone Unnoticed
"The air would not thin. The sun would not cool."
Open thread 10 lines
09 Sat

Posted a poem
Dawn has Broken
"The final shell has hit the floor,"
Open thread 28 lines
08 Fri

Posted a poem
Between the Den and the Dusk
"The golden fields began to blur,"
Open thread 56 lines
07 Thu

New follower
@Candlewitch
07 Thu

Posted a poem
The Debt of Eternal Dusk
"The moon was a sickle of rusted old bone,"
Open thread 74 lines
06 Wed

Posted a poem
The Embers Burn Low
"I set the plate, the chipped blue rim,"
Open thread 30 lines
05 Tue

Posted a poem
My First and Last
"We met when we were barely seventeen,"
Open thread 27 lines
02 Sat

New follower
@Clentin
April 2026
30 Thu

Contest commendation
04/26 When the Sun Says Goodbye

with "The Violet Tide".
23 Thu

New follower
@Karriss Carey-ivory
18 Sat

Contest commendation
Neopoet Weekly 04/12/26 to 04/18/26

with "Almost Glass".
15 Wed

Highest posting month
April 2026 — 19 poems
04 Sat

Contest commendation
Neopoet Weekly 03/29/26 to 04/04/26

with "A Brief Forever ".
04 Sat

First contest commendation
Neopoet Weekly 03/29/26 to 04/04/26

with the poem "A Brief Forever ".
March 2026
25 Wed

First critique offered
on "SCREAMING TREE!" by @Ebon Croe
24 Tue

First publication
Gamble for your Life
24 Tue

Joined Neopoet
Membership begins

First poem published 1 days later.

About Me

About me

From Sydney Australia. I love Villanelle and Lyrical Prose. Creative writing is a dual-purpose lens: it helps us zoom in on our own lives to make sense of them, while also providing a wide-angle view of worlds that don't yet exist.
I love adventure and write not only of my childhood but of cowboys, pirates and treasure hunters. Also Romance and undying love.

Location: Sydney Australia, AUS

Contest Wins

Winning Submission	Contest	Contest Date
The Embers Burn Low	05/26 New Member Contest	1 May, 2026 – 31 May, 2026
Almost Glass	Neopoet Weekly 04/12/26 to 04/18/26	12 April, 2026 – 18 April, 2026
The Violet Tide	04/26 When the Sun Says Goodbye	1 April, 2026 – 30 April, 2026
A Brief Forever	Neopoet Weekly 03/29/26 to 04/04/26	29 March, 2026 – 4 April, 2026