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The Cure of Nature

Submitted by gregwa8 on Wed, 2018-09-05 23:22

the sound of my
anxious thoughts
like an anchor
pulled up over the gunwale

compete with
the sounds of
nature

the waves
gently
lapping the side
of my boat

one is as heavy
and severe
as a stone
dropped in dark water

descending towards
a silty bottom

the other as buoyant
as a bubble

ascending towards
the light

Review Request (Intensity): 
I appreciate moderate constructive criticism
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
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Editing stage: 
Editing - rough draft

Comments

Rula

Thu, 2018-09-06 05:14

Rula's picture
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I like the title and the simile works well to show the impact of the anxious thoughts and how could nature gently cure.

I would merge the first two short stanzas in one.
Thank you for sharing.
Peace!

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Poetry is when an emotion has found its thought and the thought has found words ........Robert Frost☺

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gregwa8

Thu, 2018-09-06 16:50

gregwa8's picture

thanks rula! glad you liked it

author comment

raj

Thu, 2018-09-06 05:35

this poem is very genteel in nature and liked the way you compared thoughts with ripples...and mind with boat..
................................................................................

raj (sublime_ocean)

gregwa8

Thu, 2018-09-06 16:51

gregwa8's picture

thanks raj!

author comment
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