Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.

By Your Side

Like a dream she floats
As my arms resist
Her presence hovers
Like an Angel of bliss.

Just longing to inhale
The fragrance of love
And linger close
To a snow white dove.

Her every movement
Glows with soft pink light
Like a magic vision
She transforms the night.

Her eyes sparkle
Like Spanish treasure
Just to be near her
Is my greatest pleasure.

Her voice calls to me
Like whispering bells
In a Garden of golden apples
She dwells.

Eternal Spring flowers
Grow in that place
Where she rules them all
with sweetness and grace.

Wild animals also
Play there and dance.
As she tames their spirits
With a single glance.

Her beauty is a work
Of sublimest art.
As she beckons me on
With the charms of her heart.

So I journey thence
Over Seas and Lands.
Just for the honor
Of kissing her hand.

Style / type: 
Structured: Western
Review Request (Intensity): 
I appreciate moderate constructive criticism
Review Request (Direction): 
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Last few words: 
A poem i dedicated to a girl i used to work with. We really cared for each other, but she was taken and I wasn't. Of
Editing stage: 
Content level: 
Not Explicit Content


Isn't that always the way- we find someone we want but can't have. A touching write with good imagery. Well done.


Thanks so much for that Rose. And yes, it is always the way. Story of my life for the most

But it's all good.

Live and learn...
try to do better nx time.

Or as close to better as I can get...hehe.

Take care.

author comment

Just keep disappearing- I don't know what's worse- not being able to have them because they are taken or having them disappear after you start to really like them- like you said, live and learn!


Yes, you live, and hope that you learn from the negative things that intrude into our lives. But sometimes you don't learn and so have to go thru it again. And I can lay claim to that prize.

But it's only because I'm foolish enough to think it couldn't happen again, yet it does. Then it happens again, and again, and again. And I'm left wondering is it just me, or is it the rest of the world that screwed up? LOL.

Still trying to figure that one out, is where I'm at right now.

But, it was really good hearing from you again, Rose. And it was good getting your feedback on issues, or emotions I should say that as writers, can make us or break

"Don't be concerned, it will not harm you
It's only me pursuing somethin' I'm not sure of
Across my dreams with nets of wonder
I chase the bright elusive butterfly of love."

Be well.

author comment

I'm sorry that things couldn't have been different for you. It's obvious your feelings for this woman were deep. Unrequited love? To love someone and not be able to be with them is truly heartbreaking. I once had a love like this. Nothing harder than loving and having them so close but so far away.

Sorry if my comment is a little personal but it kind of hit a nerve in me. Maybe inspiring me to write of the love I once had.

It's sadly beautiful and the rhythm is divine. Bravo.

Kind regards Jayne-Chloe

“The world is full of magic things, patiently waiting for our senses to grow sharper.” — W.B. Yeats

Thanks so much for yer lovely comments, Seren. I really do appreciate them more than you know. This was just my way of letting a girl know how much I was in awe of her looks. When certain girls' beauty moves me enough, then all these images flood into my mind, then the words come pouring out of me. And I am unable to control it.

Then I quickly have to grab a pen and paper to capture all these words and images that populate my mind. So that is what more or less happened here. And yes, yer right of course. There is a melancholy thread running through this. And part of that is not being able to get on the same wavelength as her at the same time.

Like, whenever I tried to pursue her, she was occupied with someone, or something else. And so once more my feelings retreated into the background until a more opportune time presented itself. And so slowly the feelings of hope started to give way to, not hopelessness, but to expected disappointment at the time I guess. I don't's weird. lol.

But I have some real heartbreakers that would bring the entire site to However, I will not share those until some time later. I do not wanna throw people into a state of depression.

I would rather throw them into a state of reflective

Take care.

author comment

Good word. Never heard it as a superlative adjective. Took me by surprise. I am a nerd.

Great job,

Thanks a lot for that my friend. But yes, I often try and twist words or find new uses for them. And which I have done to a certain degree here. But i have also created some new forms of poetry in my attempt to do this.

I'll post some things I have done later on, to show you exactly what I'm talking about.

But no my friend, you are far from being a nerd. You are actually like the coolest dude I've met on a poetry site ever, no lie.

I don't think i have ever heard of the word, sublimest I was just trying to find the exact perfect word which would not slow down or alter my rhyme scheme in any way. That's when i hit upon that word. For it carries the image over into the realm of the unreal. Plus it also sounded really cool...haha!

Thanks again my friend for the feedback.

Take care.

author comment

in this line:
"Of kissing her hand."

just for the honor
(of taking her hands)
just a suggestion, it is your poem and your choice. the poem is excellent. I usually, I don't care much for love poems. but yours is lovely.

*hugs, Cat

When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.

Thanks so much for yer lovely words Candlewitch. I really enjoyed hearing what you had to say.

Hmmm, an interesting suggestion. It clearly presents two different emotional images. Kissing her hands, suggests a deep-abiding love. While taking her hands almost makes it seem like I'm leading her away somewhere, perhaps to some pleasant grotto where love can be explored to the fullest depths. Or, it could also suggest taking the hands as in marriage.

All choices have obvious literary merit of course, and either would work fine for my poem. But at the time I was writing this, I was attempting to find some more affectionate, and yes intimate gesture of devotion, but without letting the image get away from me to either extreme. And so I chose kissing the hand because it presented all the emotions I felt, but without getting to the really mushy

But anyway, thank you for yer comments and the suggestion. It is a good one no doubt, but just not the one I was looking for at that time, for that particular person.

But it was great hearing from you. And thanks again.

Be well.

author comment

thank you for explaining your reasons for the line being what it is :) I now understand and agree with you completely!

*hugs, Cat

When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.

Thank you so much for understanding my friend. ((((Hugs))))

Take care.

author comment
(c) No copyright is claimed by Neopoet to original member content.