Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.

Supply & Demand

Submitted by MrsEmarie on Tue, 2020-04-28 12:58

Are you looking for love
Or are you looking for me?
We are the same flesh
Different souls
We are queens
Of competing islands

I will make you feel
Like she never can
Break your heart
Bring you back begging for more
She will spellbind you
Promises of tomorrows never met

We are the combination
Of a life lived in questions
Never worthy of answers
Always craving more
Fragile existence
Dominant disposition

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
[This option has been removed]
Last few words: 
I am both and she is always the other.
Editing stage: 
Editing - draft

Comments

Geezer

Wed, 2020-04-29 12:03

Geezer's picture
Volunteer badge

I thought about what it might mean and as I read the poem, I felt that I got it. A poem about someone who is "spellbound"
by the wiles and promises of someone who will never deliver. Sad, that many are "blinded by the light" and held in thrall; when they could be happy for the rest of their life, by expanding their horizons. Seems like a common theme this Spring.
Geezer.
.

There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

(c) Neopoet.com. No copyright is claimed by Neopoet to original member content.