Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.
So Much My Heart Can Take
There is only so much I can
take my dear, so much I can do.
but I fear that all my power
is gone when I stand here
right in front of you.
My tears turn into waterfalls
my heart hard as stone.
My soul so full of hatred
oh the fire how much it grows.
My death I know it's coming
I can see it in your eyes
when will you stop and see
the fear you put into my
life.
Style / type:
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity):
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction):
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Editing stage:
Contest:
Content level:
Not Explicit Content
(c) Neopoet.com. No copyright is claimed by Neopoet to original member content.
Comments
Rosewood Apothecary
Wed, 2023-02-08 06:48
Hi Heather
Another deeply emotional poem from you. Are you Ok? I’m always around if you need a rescue.
I like your writing. I want to continue to work with you on format and I hope I’m not overstepping.
Try this
There is (only) so much I can take my dear,
so much I can do.
but I fear that all my power is gone
when I stand here
right in front of you.
My tears turn into waterfalls
my heart hard as stone.
My soul so full of hatred
oh the fire how much it grows.
My death I know it's coming
I can see it in your eyes
when will you stop and see
the fear you put into my life.
You’re doing so well, keep it up,
Tim