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Primal

Meet me forever
where loves intertwine
My ever full cup
Keeps me drunk on your wine

Clouds roll exposing
Pale light of your moon
Now I’m shapeshifting
My senses in tune

I smell and I taste
Your breath on the air
Quiet and confident
Lacking in fear

Query now sight locked
I’m in for the kill
So long until next time
My cup needs a fill

Style / type: 
Structured: Western
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
Editing stage: 
Content level: 
Not Explicit Content

Comments

Hi, Tim,
I am not fully certain of the intent of the poem, but it absolutely feels primal. I am intrigued!
L

But like the song “Hungry Like the Wolf.”

author comment

That's primal! I especially like using "shapeshifing." It adds to the imagination. A wild final line.
L

Such a pure, often impulsive emotion. Another fantastic write.

~RoseBlack~

the shapeshifting as tuning your senses to the right mood, like a mating pair, instead of wild impulsive ravaging. Unless of course, that is the nature of the beast. Interesting thoughts! Your title brought me in, the pace was fast, and the theme intriguing! ~ Geez.
.

There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

I hear the melody of a love song within your lines. very colorful language stirs the imagination. I would dearly love to hear the resulting effort of creative energy.

*hugs, Cat
ever, eddy

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