Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.

Paint Me A Picture

Paint me a picture
just any ol' view

Paint me a picture
you can make one or
make two

Paint me the sunset
name what you will
paint me a ride oh
what a thrill

Paint me a heart
for I have none you
see

Paint me some love
for you and for me.

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Editing stage: 
Content level: 
Not Explicit Content

Comments

Sort of bittersweet. It’s a little sad but you say it with tact and beauty. The painting metaphors are working because they’re simple and common to all readers.

Well done,
Tim

how now I wish
I had been a painter
not a poet ...
to fulfill your wish
but still try I will
in poetry

(c) Neopoet.com. No copyright is claimed by Neopoet to original member content.