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In My Element (Erotica)
Sky diamonds aligned
Cosmic bursts at night
Brightly colored auras
Etched in hazy moonlight
And his kiss was spirit
Entering my body
Awakening the dead inside
Every emotion took a hit
His touch was fire
Setting my soul ablaze
Crying for more
The need was dire
Breathing in tantric air
Our scents intermingled
Pleasure surged like raging water
Then it was over
And so I wait
For his promised return
Under night's velvet blanket
In a spot meant for us alone
Beneath the stars....
Style / type:
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity):
I appreciate moderate constructive criticism
Editing stage:
Contest:
Content level:
Not Explicit Content
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Comments
IknowimgoodEnuf82
Sat, 2023-01-14 03:06
I wasn't sure if she was
I wasn't sure if she was describing a man or a beautiful night's sky.
The flow of words didn't appeal to me.
Title didn't fit what I was thinking the poem was about.
RoseBlack
Sat, 2023-01-14 05:56
Hello
Thank you for your comment. The title was part of a challenge in which I used the elements to describe the intimate experience I had. I can see where it may be a bit confusing. In any event ..I appreciate your comment and thank you for the read.
~RoseBlack~
author commentHon
Sat, 2023-01-14 03:42
Interpretation
The interpretation of this poem is about a man. The author is using the element of the sky to paint a picture of scenery to describe her emotional connection with him.
RoseBlack
Sat, 2023-01-14 05:52
Hi Hon
You are correct. Thank you for your comment and looking into the deeper meaning.
~RoseBlack~
author commentRosewood Apothecary
Sat, 2023-01-14 05:01
Super job
About as tasteful a thing as I’ve ever read. The stanza and line really subliminally convey the immediate longing I feel as soon as I leave that space where we are mingled. I salute you poet. This just stunning in every way.
Tim
RoseBlack
Sat, 2023-01-14 05:54
Thank you Tim
a bit out of my comfort zone and the first time I have written anything addressing those type of emotions. I am glad you found it tasteful as that was the goal. The experience was exactly as described and I didn't want to make it sound anything but.
~RoseBlack~
author commentRoseBlack
Sat, 2023-01-14 12:59
Thank you
Glad you enjoyed!!!
~RoseBlack~
author commentRula
Sat, 2023-01-14 13:39
Awe Carrie
This is so romantic and I really love it!
❤❤❤❤❤❤
Please follow me on Instagram
https://instagram.com/poetry.jo?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y=
RoseBlack
Sat, 2023-01-14 15:47
Thank you Rula
A bit different for me and like I said above..out of my comfort zone. I wanted to portray the experience for what it was and am glad it has received such a positive response. I am not great at being romantic.
~RoseBlack~
author commentRoseBlack
Sun, 2023-01-15 01:18
Glad
You enjoyed!! Thank you for the praise!
~RoseBlack~
author commentCandlewitch
Sun, 2023-01-15 05:08
dear Carrie,
I feel that there is a decided lack of romantic guys out there. Is it something taught by mothers or born with? I love your poem. it created a whole new world!
*ever, eddy styx
p.s.
I'm a romantic guy, but I usually end up killing the object of my affection,
*
When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.
Rosewood Apothecary
Sun, 2023-01-15 05:28
Dear Cat
When I was a kid my father set an example for me to follow. Love is patient, love expresses itself emotionally and physically and it doesn’t hide when other people come around. Flowers for no reason at all is always the best reason. Now I’m teaching my children by example too.
I want to be loved a certain way and so that’s what I project.
Tim
RoseBlack
Sun, 2023-01-15 06:49
Tim
All of this! My dad set the bar high as he is a man of character and since I really didn't know any different, I assumed all men were like him or had the potential to be like him. I now know that isn't the case. Men like the two of you are a rare breed and it is refreshing to know you are out there and teaching future generations how to be people of character. I have recently learned how I want to be loved and what I am deserving of as far as love goes. Thank you for being you!
~RoseBlack~
author commentRoseBlack
Sun, 2023-01-15 06:47
Hello Eddy
I feel like there are a lot who are self serving....men and women, however, sometimes we get lucky and find someone we totally mesh with as is the case here.
~RoseBlack~
author commentRoseBlack
Sun, 2023-01-15 15:20
Hi mark
I am glad you liked this!!! Thank you.
~RoseBlack~
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